The Menstuff® library lists pertinent books concerning various feelings including anger,assertiveness, depression, fear, forgiveness, general, grief, joy, loneliness and shame, which are listed separately. See also books on death, feelings-general, anger, assertiveness, depression, fear, forgiveness, joy, lonliness, shame and Issues. Updated 4/7/01.
The Healing Power of Creative
Mourning: Poems. The poems in this new collection deal
with the universal themes of coping with illness, death, grief,
loss, and bereavement. From the preface by Fred and Jan Yager,
"Creativity can help to fill the emotional void caused by a loss.
It empowers you as you take that loss, whether it's because of
terminal illness, death, or separation and create something from
it. But whether or not you write your own poetry, there is a
cathartic benefit to reading the poems of others. They're also
meant to entertain, like a good blues ballad..." The collection
also includes an Epilogue on coping with grief, including selected
references and a list of resources for information or direct help,
including web site addresses. Topics dealt wth in this original
collection include: coping with a miscarriage, illness and
death of a father; a mother, a brother, a grandfather, a friend, a
therapist, and John F. Kennedy, Jr.; the holidays after a loved
one dies; death during the Vietnam War, and more. Hannacroix Creek
Books, www.hannacroix.com
or hannacroix@aol.com
2000. ISBN 1-889262-47-1 Buy
This Book!
Blauner, Bob, ed, Our Mothers' Spirits:
on the death of mothers and the grief of men. No event in
recent memory has better illuminated the powerful connection
between mother and son that the recent death of Princess Diana. In
this timely and moving new anthology, Bob considers the personal
impact of Diana's death upon her sons William and Harry, and how
sons come to terms with this profound loss, often slowly,
throughout the rest of their lives. This book is a powerful
collection of beautifully rendered tributes to the women who bore
some of America's most talented, thoughtful male writers. These
moving essays combine heartfelt, sometimes painful memories with
rare insights into the nature of the often unexpressed feelings
that sons have about their mothers. Regan Books www.harpercollins.com
Paperback version. 1998 Buy
This Book!
Bozarth, Alla Renee, Journey Through Grief: Gentle,
specific help to get you through the most difficult stages of
grieving. In the long and anguishing journey of grief after
the loss of a loved on, the author sensitively brings a message of
assurance, comfort and hope. She will tell you wht to expect, what
to do, and what to think. She will help you to understand the
physical symptoms of grieving and to express what the loss really
means to you. "Grief is a passion...we can meet it, endure it, and
become quiet victors through the honest and courageous process of
grieving well." Hazelden, 1994 ISBN 1-56838-037-2 Buy
this book!
Fumia, Molly, A Piece of My
Heart: Living through the grief of miscarriage, stillbirth,
or infant death. The loss of a child to miscarriage,
stillbirth or infant death is a devastating experience to parents
who were anticipating the joy of a new presence in their lives.
Although their feeling are real and complex, there is often not an
acknowledgment of the deep attachment the parents had to this
young life, and so they are ultimately denied a safe place to live
through their grieving. The author provides that safe place where
grieving can lead to healing. By telling her powerfully moving
story - the loss of her week-old son, Jeremy - she affirms the
sacred right that all of us have to mourn the loss of children.
She gives us hope that in dealing with the pain and honoring the
grief process we all can eventually be healed. Conari Press, 2000
ISBN 1-57324-510-0 Buy
this book!
Golden, Thomas, Swallowed by a Snake: The
gift of the masculine side of healing. This book is about loss
and is meant to be a map and guide through such an experience. It
will help both men and women understand the masculine side of
healing and help men move through the pain of loss and into a
place of transformation. You will discover new and powerful ways
to heal, how the genders differ in their healing, have a greater
understanding between partners, see examples of successful and
unique healing strategies, see a path to realize and honor your
own uniqueness, see new ways to understand your grief, and see
ways an individual's loss can impact the entire family. Golden
Healing Publishing for Tom's "crisis, grief and healing" website,
click here www2.dgsys.com/~tgolden/
1996 ISBN 0-9654649-0-3 Buy
this book! Second Edition, McDonald & Woodward Pub Co.
2000 ISBN: 0965464911 Buy
this book!
Hall, Donald, Without. These poems are
written to and for his wife, who died in 1995. The first half
sketches her illness and death; the second half addresses her in
the ensuing year. Unlike Thomas Hardy's elegies to his wife, Emma,
"they celebrate a marriage of deep intimacy and great happiness".
Hall speaks to us all of grief - as a husband and as a poet
lamenting the death of a poet. Author of thirteen volumes of verse
and many books of prose, this is his greatest achievement. He
continues to inhabit the farmhouse, occupied by his family for
generations, where he and his wife lived. Houghton Mifflin
Company, 1999 ISBN 0-395-95765-6 Buy
This Book!
James, John & Russell Friedman,
The Grief Recovery Handbook: The action program for
moving beyond death, divorce and other losses. Incomplete
recovery from grief can have a lifelong negative effect on your
capacity for happiness. Drawing from their own histories, as well
as from others, the authors illustrate what grief is and how it is
possible to recover and regain energy and spontanetiy. Based on a
proven program, now extensively revised, the handbook offers
grievers the specific actions needed to complete the grieving
process and accept loss. For those ready to regain a sense of
aliveness, the principles outlined here make this a life-changing
handbook. HarperPerennial www.harpercollins.com
1998 ISBN 0-06-095273-3 Buy
this book!
Levang, Elizabeth, When Men
Grieve: Why men grieve differently & how you can
help. Bradshaw says "Finally we have an honest,
straightforward portrayal of men and grief." "This book will lead
many men (and the women wsho love them_ to deeper undersatnding
and healing," says Ken Druck. This book looks at grief and shows
why women seldom understand men's grief and why, so often, men
remain in grief for a much longer period, once they begin.
Fairview Press, 1998 ISBN 1-57749-078-9 Buy
this book!
Levine, Stephen, Unattended
Sorrow: Recovering from loss and reviving the heart. What
does unattended sorrow look like? It is like a low-grade
fever; it troubles our sleep and drains away our days; it scatters
intuition and creates an underlying anxiety; it sours the eye and
the ear and leaves a distaste in the mouth; it's the vague
uncertainty that permeates every thought before every action; it's
the heart working as hard as it can. It's what most of us carry
with us from day to day. And it's what the author, a renowned
grief counselor, focuses on here. He writes that long after the
initial loss has passed and the "period of grieving" has ended, an
unattended sorrow lingers, accounting for a host of physical,
emotional, and spiritual maladies. It's not uncommon, then, for
those with unresolved grief to lean toward addictions or dangerous
behaviors or other forms of self-destruction. He addresses the
grief from fresh loss but also attends to the pain and troubles
caused by the unresolved anguish, sadness, and delayed stress that
can accumulate over a lifetime - whether it's angst caused by
death, the loss of self-identity, childhood abuse, illness,
divorce, or even just being alive in today's world. He notes that
though we may never wholly overcome the sorrows we've endured, we
can confront them with mercy and self-acceptance that smoothes the
path to healing the heart. www.warmrocktapes.com,
Rodale Press, rodalestore.com,
2005, ISBN 1-59486-065-3, 
Mazis, Glen, Trickster, Magician & Grieving
Men: Reconnecting men with earth. This book shows
how many men are unable to deal with the pain, preferring to fly
above the earth - and their feelings. The author brilliantly
contrasts the Desert Storm War - with its emphasis on air power
and men insulated in their super tank-bodies - with the way men
deal with personal challenges in their everyday lives. Then, using
male images drawn from recent films and from ancient stories, he
champions men who are able to embrace pain, who see themselves
humorously, who are playfully caught up with others, and who savor
the sensual richness of the planet. Bear, 1993
ISBN 1-879181-11-8 Buy
this book!
Stuadacher, Carol, Men
& Grief: A guide for men surviving the
death of a loved one, a resource for caregivers & mental
health professionals. Reading this book was a profoundly
healing experience. I am convinced that this important work will
not only fill a void in the grief literature, but will be an
essential resource for caregivers as well as for men stumbling
over so much unfinished, unresolved grief. The author's conclusion
that "The reason for processing grief is not to weaken life, but
to strengthen it," contains wisdom that I will gratefully
incoporate into my own work and grieving. True to her advice to
caregivers, the book itself is gentle and kind. The entire section
on releasing grief I found to be enormously helpful and full of
therapeutic insight, skill and encouragements. New Harbinger, 1991
ISBN 0-934986-72-X
Treadway, David, Dead Reckoning: A therapist confronts his own
grief. In the midst of a seemingly full life as a successful
therapist, husband and father, the author realizes that he needs
to work through the same kind of unresolved grief that he normally
helps his clients with. This comes when he realizes he has never
been able to grieve his mother's death. "I can barely remember
her," he writes. "Thinking of her makes me angry. I was actually
relieved when she died and in the past 25 years I've barely given
her a second thought." A remarkable blend of private reminiscence,
professional insight, and rich human detail, this is both a vivid
personal narrative of a complex, unhappy family and a courageous
pilgrimage toward self-understanding and acceptance. Basic,
1996
Webb, Dwight, 50 Ways to Love Your Leaver:
Getting on with your life after the breakup. In this
compassionate, engaging guide to examining the emtional wounds of
loss, the author helps you discover your own personal way of
grieving, learn to express yourself in healthy, productive ways,
and avoid the blame and bitterness that can seriously affect your
physical, social, psychological, spiritual and sexual life. Why
should you love your leaver - the person who betrayed your deepest
trust? Possibly your best friend? Why should you
be loving when you're angry? Anger is okay? It stems
from self-love. However, it will not serve you if it becomes your
weapon of revenge. If your motive is to even the score, your
anger, like a volcano, will destroy everything in its path and
leave you smoldering. Drawing on the work of Dr. Elisabeth
Kubler-Ross, the author has developed 10 steps of grieving
relationship loss. Using this model along with revealing exercises
to help you chart your own process of grief and recovery, you can
work through your feelings of initial shock, denial and anger.
This process gradually moves you toward understanding, acceptance
and taking charge of your life with renewed faith in yourself. The
fifty ways of "loving your leaver" cultivate self-discovery and
building the joyful optimism and self-confidence vital to learning
to trust again. Among his tips for rekindling the spirit of your
more open, sensual, sexual, romantic and playful self, he suggests
you: Let in the truth and deal with as much reality as you
are able to and still cope. Find support with friends and famly
when you can, and a professional counselor when necessary. Let go
and wish your former partner well. The goal is to grieve the loss
and come up stronger, smarter and happier. It is not just recovery
to where you were, buy beyond to a stronger and clearer state of
consciousness with greater stability and balance. Impact
Publishing, 2000 ISBN 1-886230-22-6 Buy
This Book!Everything looks different through tears. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me
Women cry an average of 5.3 times a month, men 1.4 times.
"Grief is a most peculiar thing; we're so helpless in the face of
it. It's like a window that will simply open on its own accord. The
room grows cold, and we can do nothing but shiver. But it opens a
little less each time, and a little less; and one day we wonder what
has become of it." Nitta Sayuri from Memoirs
of a Geisha
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