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May
Infidelity - Again! It Can Happen to You More
Than Once
The fallout of infidelity and extramarital affairs
is heart-wrenching and traumatic. But did you know
that it could happen again if you don't recognize
the signs!
Did you know that the majority of people who
experience infidelity in their relationships will
likely experience it again - even if they move on
to other relationships!!
Pretty unbelievable - but unfortunately, it's
the truth. One would think that getting badly
burned once would be enough. But that's not quite
the way it happens for many....
There ARE reasons for why infidelity, adultery
and extra marital affairs often become a repeated
pattern for some people in relationships and not in
others. People are complicated and things are not
always as they appear.
Nepenthes, a relationship's vulnerability to
infidelity comes down to the following major three
factors...
One - People's choices in a partner or
spouse are not in line with what they need or want,
or with what their spouse or partner can give them.
In other words, there is a mismatch along the
important dimension of emotional intimacy.
Two - People fail to make their
relationships a priority by putting the time and
energy into them that they need. That leaves them
open for infidelity and cheating to take root.
Three - People fail to understand the
issues that lead to the infidelity, adultery and
extra marital affair in the first place. They also
don't see the part they played in the
relationship's failure. For many people, it is
easier to blame someone else for things that went
wrong rather than looking inward for
understanding.
Does any of this ring a bell? If it does, then
it's time to pay attention. Goodness knows, you
don't need another round of the heartache and grief
that comes with infidelity and extra marital
affairs.
© 2008, Reena
Sommer
* * *
However often marriage is dissolved, it remains
indissoluble. Real divorce, the divorce of heart
and nerve and fiber, does not exist, since there is
no divorce from memory. - Virgilia Peterson
Dr. Reena
Sommer is an internationally recognized
relationship and divorce consultant. She became
widely known as a strong critic of domestic
violence policies that failed to recognized the
reciprocal nature of partner abuse.
Dr. Sommer has been an invited
speaker to academic, government and lay audiences
in Canada and the U.S.. In 1998, Dr. Sommer
testified before the Joint Senate-House of Commons
Committee on Custody and Access on the issue of
domestic violence. More recently in April 2002, she
was invited by the Canadian federal government to
participate on a panel of experts on the issue of
custody and access.
She has written extensively on
relationship and family issues such as domestic
violence, addictions, divorce and custody. Her
interest in high conflict relationships led her
toward developing expertise as a divorce consultant
in the assessment and treatment of parental
alienation syndrome under Dr. Richard Gardner. As
well, Dr. Sommer recently completed her e-Book,
The
Anatomy of an Affair. A
free condensed pdf version of the e-Book can be
downloaded.
Dr. Sommer has produced three
divorce related informational products which are
currently available online in the form of
downloadable audiofiles: Divorce 101: Things You
are Unlikely to Hear from an Attorney;
Developing
an Effective Parenting
Plan, and
Preparing
for a Custody
Evaluation.
You are also welcome to sign up
for a free mini-course, Arming
Yourself for Your Custody
Battle! See
www.reenasommerassociates.mb.ca
or for more information, please email us at
E-Mail
or 204. 487.7247 or fax:
204.487.3051
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