Facebook Flirting Fails
A month ago I saw this girl at a dance party. We
stared at each other for a very long time and the
spark was obviously there, but I had to leave and
she had friends next to her so I missed the chance
to meet her.
Few days ago, I came across her profile on
Facebook and guess what, we are at the same
university! I sent her a friend request, explaining
our early acquaintance and I told her I would be
happy to take the first step for meeting her on
Facebook since the chances of coming across with
her and meeting her in person are very low.
She accepted my friend request without any
response. Then I messaged her asking some questions
about dance and her department, etc. She replied in
a very friendly manner but surprisingly, she said
she does not remember me! (Wow, how do you forget a
person you have explicitly flirted with?)
At the same time, she left a flirtatious and
funny comment under one of my photos, relating to
another photo of me, which obviously made me think
that she has been scanning through my profile.
After a few messages back and forth, I told her
I would like to meet her in person and would like
to know her better and I asked for her number. She
replied "Of course, I would be glad to meet you,
but you give me your number and I will message
I gave her my number, respecting her privacy.
However, she hasn't messaged me for 2 days. I
started to wonder if she is not interested although
she said she would be happy to meet me.
The more surprising thing is, she keeps
commenting on my status on Facebook in this 2 days
Is she playing games? Could you please give me
an insight on what to do? Thank you.
So, you were waiting for the "perfect
opportunity" to approach her and it never came.
That figures - they never DO come! If you continue
to wait for perfect opportunities, or even good
ones without MAKING them for yourself, you're going
to be one lonely guy!
Next point: OF COURSE she didn't message you!
Regardless of what she said, it's not her job to
move this forward, it's YOURS. You tried to give
that up and put it in her hands. She's not going to
call you or text you (god forbid anyway!) You
could call this a "game", but it's one you've lost
for lack of knowing what to do. Honestly, I can
hardly blame her since you've set yourself up for
all of this!
Here are some rules you'd better learn (and by
the way, there are more of them than just this
1) Perfect opportunities never come. Good ones
2) You need to learn to MAKE opportunities with
women because of this!
3) It's YOUR JOB to approach women - regardless
of the eye contact or friends or whatever.
4) When you don't, they instantly think you're a
5) Unfortunately, they are almost always
6) When you do approach them, you need to get
DIGITS at the very least.
7) Using Facebook or technology of any kind
works against you in all of this
8) Because it makes you look weak and cowardly
in women's eyes.
9) When you give a woman your number this
confirms weakness and cowardliness.
10) ...and for that reason alone, you're not
likely to hear from this girl.
Now, your next question is: "how do I fix
My answer: "You can't." How are you ever going
to prove to this girl what you've been screaming at
her all this time (weakness/cowardliness).
You have to work entirely from a point of
powerlessness. If you contact her again via
Facebook, the very best you can do is say, "Well,
can we get together now? Pretty please?????"
Begging is never a good way to come off as
masculine and powerful. What you should have done
was to approach her when you had the chance. All of
this would have been solved if you'd have just done
that first. If she tried to pull that pre-test
about you giving her your digits, you should have
said, "Ok, no thanks. I'm only interested in girls
that don't need to play that game. Obviously, if
you can't give someone your phone number, you're
never going to be dating anyway and I'm only
interested in women that are serious and mature
about these things."
If you had done that, she's have shoved her
number in your hand so fast it'd make your head