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Best Time of the Year for Sex
Q from a female, senior from the University of
Maine wants to know....University of Maine. How
does a women tactfully tell her partner that she is
not satisfied, that he needs to slow down and
perhaps take time to do a few more things rather
than just take care of himself - especially when he
is convinced that he is doing everything well? How
do you bring this up?
Dr. Caron's response: First of all, I
would suggest the conversation take place outside
the bedroom. You could begin by saying, "I think
our lovemaking is nice, but I'd like to tell you a
few things that would make it even better." Or, you
may want to ask him what pleases him sexually. Even
if he responds that everything is fine, you could
let him know that some things he does for you are
fine but he must have some preferences also. By
getting him to talk about what he really likes
opens up the conversation for you to tell him what
you like. It's important to be specific and let him
know what turns you on, where, when.... In bed, you
may want to show him how you like to be touched.
Keep in mind that no one likes to be criticized or
made to feel stupid, so try to give your partner
positive feedback. By communicating with each
other, you will be better able to meet each other's
needs.
© 2008, Sandra L.
Caron
* * *
It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the
lover. - Marge Piercy
American teens have the worst of all
worlds...Our children are bombarded and confronted
with sexual messages, sexual exploitation, and all
manner of sexual criticism. But our society is by
and large sexually illiterate. Faye Westheimer
Dr. Sandra L.
Caron is a professor of human sexuality at the
University of Maine. To submit a question to Dr.
Caron or chat with your peers visit
www.CollegeSexTalk.com
Got a question for Dr. Caron? Visit
www.collegesextalk.com/questions.htm
and ask away! Get a guaranteed personal and
confidential response to your question:
www.my-secure-site.com/collegesextalk/
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