Blending Families with Pumpkin and Pecans
Once again the holidays are almost here. My family
celebrates Thanksgiving and Christmas.
When my husband and I got together about a
decade ago we each had two kids from our previous
marriages, ranging from ages twelve to twenty. It's
been somewhat challenging every year to figure a
way each of us could spend the holidays with our
own kids, while celebrating together as a couple.
Sometimes it's been impossible.
Today our "kids" are all grown up, with
significant others of their own. One of my sons
lives out of town and returns home to visit twice a
year. I cherish those brief visits. We also have a
grandchild (on my husband's side of the family) who
is old enough this year to really get into the
whole celebration thing. There are former spouses
living nearby who also wish to spend the day with
So... there's the possibility of rotating, being
with one side of the family on Thanksgiving and the
other on Christmas; and then switching the
following year. But that's never worked out.
Sometimes we are invited one place, or the other,
or both. The closest thing to success has been
inviting everyone to just stop by our home any time
throughout the day.
It may get confusing, but I'm thankful to have
my family with which to celebrate while so many
people can't be with their loved ones for the
I have no room to complain about who eats
pumpkin pie at which house. Besides, pecan is
better according to my dog Angie who stole over
half a pecan pie from the kitchen counter last
©2011, Mary Lou
* * *
Mary Lou St.
Lucas is a former stay-at-home mom who has
participated in custody and divorce-related support
groups. She often speaks out through impassioned
letters to local newspapers regarding issues
affecting quality of life for children and
families. She has experienced divorce, including
the heartbreaking decision to give up daily contact
with her two sons for what she believed was their
best interest at that time, as well as the societal
stigma attached to being a non-custodial mother.
She emphasizes the importance of kids having BOTH
parents in their lives on a regular basis, even if
the parents cannot or will not be married anymore.
She hopes other parents will see that there may be
alternatives to the standard custody arrangements,
depending on the individual situation. She writes
from her perspective of today instead of revisiting
and dwelling on the painful emotions of her past.
She strives to live a full life in spite of a
recent diagnosis of fibromyalgia, and believes a
sense of humor is mandatory. mlstuff.blogspot.com/2007/08/male-bashing-t-shirts.html
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