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Blocks to Listening
Being a good listener takes more than being
attentive to your partner when he or she talks with
you. Instead, the key to strong communication is
knowing the characteristics of a poor listener.
The act of NOT listening is not exclusively a
fault of men; women do it just as often. Below is a
list of common blocks to effective listening:
- Feelings of being right and your partner
being wrong.
- Insecurity about topics that creates
defensiveness.
- Silently resenting your pattern.
- Silently or verbally criticizing what your
partner is saying.
- Being preoccupied with other issues.
- Being impatient or not in the mood to
talk.
- Rehearsing what you will say while your
partner is talking.
- Jumping to hasty conclusions.
- Dismissing what you hear.
- Racing ahead of what your partner is
saying.
- The build up of strong emotions during a
discussion.
- A dislike for the subject.
- Feeling misunderstood.
The key to effective communication is
identifying when you are doing any of the
roadblocks above and work to change it. Like all
change, it requires practice, but it's possible as
long as you are willing to make the effort.
© 2007 ExpertDatingAdvice.com
Other Relationship Issues,
Books
Nancy Fagan is
the best-selling author of 'The Complete Idiot's
Guide to Romance' and 'Desirable Men: How to Find
Them' has appeared on several hundred radio and
television shows including Ricki Lake, Men are from
Mars/Women are from Venus, ABC News, NBC News, CBS
News, The Berman & Berman Show, FOX News. She
has been featured in most major newspaper in the
United States and worldwide as well as regularly
mentioned in the nation's top magazines such as
Ladies' Home Journal ('Can this Marriage be
Saved?'), Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Men's Health,
Bride's, Seventeen, Women's Day, Family Circle,
Women's Own, BBW, Complete Women and dozens of
others. To read more, visit www.ExpertDatingAdvice.com
This column is reprinted with permission from
NancyFagan@ExpertDatingAdvice.com
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