Menstuff® has compiled information, books and resources on the issue of relationships.
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The Differences Between Women and
Men
She Said, He Said
Stiff
Competition
Father's Day
Mother's Day 1870
Happy "Bad
Father's" Day says the Fox Television Channel
Digging for Gold
What AOL is Telling Women
Women
& Television
Building Trust?
Love
Articles
The Daily
Husband Blog
Snippets
Finally a fair way to
fight
Books: Communication,
Conflict
Resolution, Domestic
Violence, Marriage,
Relationship,
Sexism, Sex
Roles, Social
Theory, Men on
Women, and Women on
Men
Related Issues: Domestic
Violence, Marriage, Relationships,
Reproduction, and the issue of
Humor and books on Humor
which include some of the biggest ways the "war of the sexes" is
fueled. Please say "That isn't funny!" not only to rape jokes, but to
any joke that shames or demeans another person - especially to the
ones sent in group e-mails. Just click on the "Reply All" button and
let them all know where you stand.
Weekly Columns
Women Don't Lie -
Men Don't Listen - Doc Love is a West Coast talk show
host, entertainment speaker, and coaches men in his seminars. He
provides us with a weekly column on relationships. www.doclove.com
Tom Blake - Is
the author of Middle
Aged and Dating Again and Finding
Love After 50: How to begin, where to go, what to do. Visit
him at www.findingloveafter50.com
Nancy Fagan -
is the best-selling author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to
Romance and Desirable Men: How to Find Them. Visit
www.ExpertDatingAdvice.com
The New
Intimacy - Judith Sherven, Ph.D. and James Sniechowski,
Ph.D., a husband and wife psychology team from the East Coast discuss
weekly The
New Intimacy from their book by the same name. They can be
heard M-F 4-5 PM and Saturdays 9-Noon on www.wisdomradio.com
Being a Man:
Dr. Dennis W. Neder is the author of Being
a Man in a Woman's World.Got a love, relationship or man/woman
question? He'll answer all letters. Write dwneder@remingtonpublications.com
for answers or visit: www.remingtonpublications.com
Susie and Otto
Collins are spiritual and life partners from the Midwest who
are committed to helping others create outstanding relationships of
all kinds. Visit their web site at www.collinspartners.com
R. Don Steele
- is the author of How
to Date Young Women: For men over 35, How
to Date Young Women: For men over 35, Volume II,
and most recently, Body
Language Secrets and in lives
in Southern California. Check out steelballsAUDIO.COM
Orlando Sentinel. "In his study , Charles Waehler, author of the forthcoming book Bachelors: The Psychology of Never-Married Men found that the men share three "modes of defense" in relationships: avoidance, isolation and distortion. These single men seemed reluctant to get involved, make demands or reveal their needs in sexual relationships. Waehler found that the bachelors' defensiveness and isolation permitted interaction but bottled up emotions. They tended to be standoffish, indifferent and avoided situations where feelings could be hurt.
Note: Image behind the Lenny icon is from Ean Begg's
Myth
and Today's Consciousness. I always thought it was an
intriguing look at heterosexual women & men.
Dear Delilah (who is Deb Levine, their "relationships"? expert.)
I'm a 22-year-old Indian girl, and I've been waiting to marry a guy whom I've loved for four years now. He's not well-established or financially secure; and since I come from a well-to-do family, my parents are asking me to break up with him. I am getting marriage proposals from rich guys, and my parents want me to choose one soon.
What should I do? I have to get married fast. Should I break up with him? If so, what should I tell him so that he doesn't retaliate and ruin my marriage? Should I go ahead and get married without telling him?
Savitry
Dear Savitry,
It sounds like you've already made your decision to marry one of the wealthy men. That's a perfectly fine decision if you've spent four years with this one guy with no sign of marriage in the future.
However, you do have to show your boyfriend some respect by breaking up with him decently. Anyone would be angry to find out that his girlfriend of four years got married without telling him!
Sit down and start a conversation with him. Tell him about your family pressure to get married and your need to move on with your life. Go over the fun parts of your relationship, but then tell him that you don't see any longevity as a couple. Apologize, and call it a day. Sure he'll be hurt, but not as hurt as if you don't tell him at all.
-- June 7, 2000
Editor: Savitry will probably get what she deserves in a marriage.
Money and not lasting love. But, that's what Delilah is recommending
to women and that what she and many other women have chosen. It's too
bad that they don't remember that when the marriage goes sour. That's
how they chose to look at love.
10 dating statistics you ought to know
To me, this 63 percent figure was a revelation. I always knew dating was a numbers game, but I'd never thought to take that saying literally. But as I continued browsing through my guy's extensive, factoid-heavy book collection, I realized that there were statistics confirming just about every dating phenomenon I'd ever experienced. So why not let the statistics guide you in your search for a lasting love? With that in mind, I put together a list of 10 factoids every single person should know:
1. 44 percent of adult Americans are single, according to U.S. Census figures. This means there are over 100 million unattached folks out there. So, if you've ever worried, "There's nobody out there for me," know that there's hope!
2. Statistically, the find-someone odds favor guys: There are 86 unmarried men for every 100 unmarried women, although in some regions the gender ratio favors women, especially out West. Paradise, Nevada, a suburb 10 miles from Las Vegas, has 118 unmarried men for every 100 unmarried women. Other cities where gals got it good include Austin, Texas; Fort Lauderdale, Florida; Tempe, Arizona; and Sunnyvale and Santa Ana, California. A coincidental bonus for women thinking of relocating: All of these cities are sunny and warm.
3. The best place for single people on the prowl is New York, where 50 percent of state residents are unmarried, and Washington, D.C., where a whopping 70 percent of the population is single. The worst places are Idaho, where 60 percent of people are married; and Utah, where 59 percent of people are married.
4. Think you'll find love while perched on a barstool? Think again. Only 9 percent of women and 2 percent of men say they've found a relationship at a bar or club—blame it on the beer goggles. So if you're lonely and looking, you're better off hitting on cuties at Starbucks.
5. Got someone hot in your sights and want to reveal your interest? Fifty-one percent of people use flattery, according to the book Are You Normal About Sex, Love, and Relationships? Or, try touching them, a tactic used by 25 percent of single folk. Still another 23 percent utilize the schoolyard approach and send the word out through a friend.
6. If you're into online dating, you're hardly alone: 40 million Americans use online dating services; that's about 40 percent of our entire U.S. single-people pool. So if you haven't tried it yet, maybe it's time to dive in!
7. Profiles and photos go together great. Online, being bashful will get you nowhere. Women and men who post their photos receive more than twice as many emails as those without photos, according to a study published by economists at MIT and University of Chicago. And a Match.com survey revealed that profiles with photos had 15 times the response rate as those without. Some numbers!
8. On a date, first impressions do count: Men take only 15 minutes to decide if a woman is worth a second date. For women, the clock isn't ticking quite so fast—they ponder whether to get together again for an hour or so.
9. The number one problem for couples in America? Disagreements about money, according to a poll by the University of Denver. So, don't write off a date just because you two bickered over the dinner bill; everyone clashes over cash.
10. If you're feeling like your relationship is hitting the skids and want to bail, the painful face-to-face approach might not be necessary: An estimated 48 percent of online daters report that their breakups have happened over email. Call it rude or just plain convenient, but it happens a lot.
Meredith Broussard is the editor of an upcoming anthology, The
Encyclopedia of Exes: 26 Stories by Men of Love Gone Wrong. Her
website is www.failedrelationships.com.
Source: Meredith Broussard, msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=5288&TrackingID=516163&BannerID=558828&menuid=6
Relationships are good for your
health
Men and Women ... Both
From Mars?
Bristol, VA
Franklin, VA
Pulaski County, GA
Monroe County, WV
Randolph County, GA
If you're a single woman looking for a single man, Alaska is still a gold mine. However, our study only covreed counties in the continedntal United States.
Chattahoochee County, GA
Union County, FL
Jones County, TX
DeKalb County, MO
Crowley County, CO
Our rankings are based on the combined numbers of single, divorced
and widowed, compared to the numbers of single, divorced and widowed
women. The statistics are drawn from the 2000 Census.
Finding a Mate Who Looks Like You
Single? Where to Look for a
Mate
When Differences Make a
Difference
Is Your Relationship In Trouble?
Understanding Your Partner's
Feelings
Test Your Own Marriage
Satisfaction
Friendship: It's a Special
Relationship
Men - Study: Looks, Heart Tops For
Single Women
Instead of always harping on a man's faults, tell him of his virtures. Try to pull him out of his rut of bad habits. Hold up to him his better self, his real self that can dare and do and win out. - Eleanor H. Porter, 1868-1920
There is only one sex...A man and a woman are so entirely the same thing that one can scarely understand the subtle reasons for sex distinction with which our minds are filled. - George Sand
Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are... Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in my pillow, or stretch myself taught, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return. -- Mary Jean Iron
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