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Marriage Minded
What are the qualities you look for in a
potential wife?
Have you ever dated someone you were crazy
about, yet wished you could change this one little
thing about her? Have you reveled in the fact that
you and your sweetie had almost everything in
common, yet you still broke up? Just what is it
that we really need to look for in order to promote
a successful future with someone?
Perhaps the best way to determine whether she is
wedding-worthy is to ask yourself a few questions.
There are five basic elements that you need to
really look at before any relationship can progress
towards something truly successful. These elements
are as follows: emotional, sexual, intellectual,
financial, and spiritual.
Emotional: Take the emotional aspect of a
person’s makeup. This area includes a person's
psychological characteristics, emotional styles and
expressions. Perspective on the world, level of
self-esteem, confidence, intimacy, ability to
share, commit. Weaknesses, strengths, respect of
self and others, vanity, attitude. The list goes
on...
Sexual: Sexuality means different things to
different people. For some, it means the physical
act itself, perhaps something wild, while for
others, romance and expression play an important
part. A few traits to keep in mind when looking for
a partner might be level of interest, romance,
attraction, love, variations, response, monogamy,
communication, risk taking, playfullness, awareness
of STDs, and physical appearance.
Intellectual: How a person thinks about the
world he or she inhabits, and how they interact day
to day. Some people are casual and some thrive on
being type A personalities. A person's intellectual
style influences would include expression of ideas,
level of education, sense of humor, goals, skills,
hobbies, mistakes, converasation and learning
styles, interest and quickness of thought.
Financial: Money affects everyone. How one
treats it tells much about him or her, and can make
the difference between a comfortable life and a
life of living Hell, so it's important to be
compatible in this area. Pay attention to spending
style, lifestyle, goals, retirement, savings and
ideas about money and debt in general.
Spiritual: Spiritually doesn't necessarily mean
a person's religious orientation, rather a basic
belief system about life in general. A sense of
self, a reason for living. It includes beliefs
about ethics, the importance of religion, purpose
of life, optimism, acceptance of others, integrity,
honesty, responsibility and social values.
Using the Core Elements to Make a
Match
- Whenever you are interested in someone, it's
important to know her views on each of the five
components. The more areas of comparability, the
stronger the foundation of the relationship will
be. People can have differences, but it adds
strain to a relationship. Observe and
communicate, and hopefully, you will be able to
catch differences early on, to avoid pain
later.
© 2008, ExpertDatingAdvice.com
Other Relationship Issues,
Books
Nancy Fagan is
the best-selling author of 'The Complete Idiot's
Guide to Romance' and 'Desirable Men: How to Find
Them' has appeared on several hundred radio and
television shows including Ricki Lake, Men are from
Mars/Women are from Venus, ABC News, NBC News, CBS
News, The Berman & Berman Show, FOX News. She
has been featured in most major newspaper in the
United States and worldwide as well as regularly
mentioned in the nation's top magazines such as
Ladies' Home Journal ('Can this Marriage be
Saved?'), Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Men's Health,
Bride's, Seventeen, Women's Day, Family Circle,
Women's Own, BBW, Complete Women and dozens of
others. To read more, visit www.ExpertDatingAdvice.com
This column is reprinted with permission from
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