Fairy-tale Relationship

Fairy tales have become a part of our image of what romance is supposed to be like. This image not only deceives women, but also men. One of the definitions of the term "fairy tale" in Webster's is "a made-up story, usually designed to mislead."

On one hand, everyone knows that fairy-tale romances are make-believe. On the other hand, fairy tales inspire us to believe in happy love stories. For this fact alone, they have given us something we need for building our own love affair: hope. Many people have lost hope, and it's time to get it back.

Modeling Love on Fairy-Tales

Some people think that fairy tales create a false image for a real partner to live up to. The next time you read a fairy tale about a love affair, look to see the characteristics that form the foundation of these stories. What you will find are characteristics such as the following:

  • Looking for unconditional love
  • Wanting to be loved by someone
  • Seeking understanding
  • Looking to be accepted by another

These stories also show that life is happier with someone as opposed to being without someone. What they show is the humanness in having a mate. People innately gravitate to others for a sense of completeness. We are relational beings, with a need to relate to others. In a fairy tale, these themes are conveyed simply in a fantastical setting. In fact, fairy tales serve as wonderful models to use when deciding on what you want in your relationship.

Regaining a Belief in Fairy-Tales

How can we make romance just as magical as it is in the fairy tales? All you have to do is create your own love story, the greatest love story ever known. This means cherishing the one you love as though he were a prince or she were a princess. It means making your relationship a priority by including romance as one of its basic ingredients. An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but a kiss a day keeps others away.

© 2007

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Nancy Fagan is the best-selling author of 'The Complete Idiot's Guide to Romance' and 'Desirable Men: How to Find Them' has appeared on several hundred radio and television shows including Ricki Lake, Men are from Mars/Women are from Venus, ABC News, NBC News, CBS News, The Berman & Berman Show, FOX News. She has been featured in most major newspaper in the United States and worldwide as well as regularly mentioned in the nation's top magazines such as Ladies' Home Journal ('Can this Marriage be Saved?'), Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Men's Health, Bride's, Seventeen, Women's Day, Family Circle, Women's Own, BBW, Complete Women and dozens of others. To read more, visit This column is reprinted with permission from Send questions to E-Mail

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