How Do You Know If You Want Her For Her, Not Because You Can’t Have Her?

Most people are like a little child wanting a toy. The more mommy says no, the more that child will want it. … Right? And when it comes to dating women, the more she denies you, the more you want her. Well, not all of us are like that, but a surprising larger number of guys are. They simply can’t let her go. There is just something about here that he has to have.

Perhaps you are a little like this?

Here’s a little technique you can try, to see if you really do want her for a relationship, or your brain slid down to your dick again:

Yup, you guessed what I am about to say: After you have had sex with one of your dates, you masturbated or if you aren’t in one of those horny moods that has you jumping on anything that moves, sit down and think about this woman you are interested in. … Are your thoughts and feelings for her as strong as they were before? Really think about it. If they aren’t, well, you pretty much got your answer.

Many, many guys, when thinking with their John Henrys, think about being in a relationship, but once they have sex with their date, or after they masturbate, they no longer think about being with a woman.

Ah yes, the power of hormones!

Now, if you still want to be with her, you have to know if she is indeed the right one for you, never mind trying to get a date with her. That will come later. What’s the sense of having all these thoughts about her if she could be a man’s worst nightmare? Once you start thinking with your brain (you know, the one between your ears?), instead of your little buddy, you’ll have much better luck with women.

See Perry's other weekly columns on Relationships or Sex.

Perry Rose is a syndicated freelance writer for singles on sex, dating and relationships. He is also the author of, All About Men: Another Damn Book For Women About Men. & Women and Sex And Dating, For The Single Man published by Intimacy Books. From first getting dates from complete strangers, to finding that right person to be with, Intimacy Books has interviewed single men and women on what they like and want from one another. The findings were published in Women, Sex and Dating, for the Single Man. Their site is

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