Susie & Otto

 

The Relationship "Wake Up Call" That Almost Came Too Late...and how to make sure this doesn't happen to you.


Since we started our Relationship Breakthrough work with people like you almost 12 years ago...

One of the biggest questions people (sometimes secretly and privately) are living with is the question...

"Should I Stay or Should I Go? "

Even women and men who are in otherwise good relationships have had this question of whether to stay or go roll through their minds more than once.

We have.

We hope this doesn't offend you to hear us say this but...

We think it's normal to explore this question.

In fact, we think some people are in relationships or marriages who really should honestly consider whether it's best for them to stay together or not.

What we've found about relationships and marriages is we have ALL had "wake-up calls" that tell us we'd better do something to work on THIS relationship or else it could be too late.

Very often...

We get in a groove when it comes to how we relate to our partner and often, we don't change it until it's too late.

Since Otto started his "Light Her Up" newsletter for MEN, at http://www.LightHerUp.com -- he's been hearing some truly honest, heartfelt and insightful observations from both women and men about relationships.

Otto's newsletter is just for men but there are some women eavesdropping on the conversation going on in his newsletter and...

Here's what one woman said in response to his latest newsletter...

"It would be nice if more men and women would step back and look at their situation outside of the box."

We completely agree.

Too often we hear from both men and women that they found out what they were doing wrong in their relationship--but it was too late. Their partner had moved on.

Up until it was too late, they never looked "outside the box" of their relationship.

Looking back, they could "see" what had gone wrong but they were helpless to do anything about it at that point.

As the old saying goes, hindsight is 20/20--especially when it comes to your relationships.

Take Sherry and Brian...

Like so many couples, they were so busy, especially after they had kids, that when it came to spending time together by themselves, it was the last thing on their lists of "things to do."

It wasn't that they didn't love each other. They did.

Life was just too crazy to fit in yet another thing!

But in the process, they stopped really talking and listening to one another beyond "Who's picking up the kids?" or "Who's doing the grocery shopping?"

They had created their "relationship box" to be filled with distance, short conversations and the occasional blow-up about finances.

Sherry couldn't understand Brian's lack of concern about paying the bills on time and making sure there was money in their account when they did.

Brian couldn't understand what he called Sherry's stinginess.

They didn't take the time or feel the urgency to step out of their habitual ways of seeing their situation to find a mutual solution--until it was almost too late.

It wasn't until they almost lost their relationship that they "woke" up, stepped back and looked "outside the box" for how to work together as a team and not as two people who were in competition with one another and trying to prove the other one wrong.

Sherry and Brian got their wake up call and did something about it.

Whatever stage your relationship is in, start stepping back, taking a bird's eye view of your relationship and start thinking outside the box.

Since we all are in relationships of some kind or another, we urge you to do the same if you're single.

Looking at your situation as an outsider can open doors to finding solutions to difficulties that you might be missing because you're too close to it.

Something as simple as being curious as to why your partner said or did something that triggered you--instead of instantly blaming and belittling him or her can make all the difference to the health of your relationship.

Just the other day, a client told Susie the she had stopped a jealousy attack by backing up, taking a breath, and asking a question from curiosity rather than picking a fight.

We invite you to think outside the box when it comes to your relationships with your loved ones.

  • Consider curiosity instead of criticism.
  • Consider an open heart instead an attack .
  • Consider pointing the finger inward instead of outward.
  • Consider going on a "no-blame" diet.
  • Consider treating each other how you would treat a best friend (only better in certain ways).
  • Consider "flirting" with each other more of the time.
  • Consider spending a little more time together.

Try any one of these things and you may really be surprised by what you create in your relationship or marriage if you do!

Our best,

©2010, Susie & Otto Collins

Other Relationship Issues, Books

 

Susie and Otto Collins are spiritual and life partners who are committed to helping others create outstanding relationships of all kinds. They regularly write, speak and conduct workshops and seminars on love, relationships and personal and spiritual growth to audiences all across the USA. They are the creators of the "Relationship Toolkit" which has helped people in over a dozen countries improve their relationships. It includes a video called Spiritual Partnerships plus two booklets Love and Relationship Success Secrets and 101 Relationship Quotes Worth a Million Dollars! You can also read more articles like these and subscribe to their weekly newsletter on love and relationships by visiting their web site at www.collinspartners.com Their new E-book Should You Stay or Should You Go? has just been released and is now available www.stayorgo.com See Archives 2009, 2008, 2007, 2006, 2005, 2004, 2003, 2002 and 2001. Other Relationship Issues, Books



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