How does Prince React when She tells Him about Her
Ive had your book for a few years now, but didnt follow it enough three years ago when I met my fiancée, Nicole. She was only 19 at the time (shes 22 now and Im 26 by the way). Shes going to school in a city thats pretty far away, and I just graduated from school in another city, so Im looking for a job where she is now, since she still has two years left before she graduates.
About six months ago, Nicole told me that we should take some time off because she didnt know what she wanted and felt that something was missing in our relationship. The very next day she changed her mind and I told her that if it ever happens again I wouldnt talk to her anymore. Things have been great ever since, but yesterday she said she had to tell me something about that day. She admitted that she felt bad and had wanted to tell me this secret all along, but that she never got up the courage. She said that every time I called her baby it made her feel horrible about what she did.
Heres what happened. Just before she needed time, Nicole met her ex-boyfriend (her first love) at the park a couple of times and they kissed, but nothing more (I want to believe her, but Im taking it with a grain of salt). She said that she is extremely sorry about what happened and that she felt like she was going crazy, and that it made her realize how much she wanted me and not him. She also said she regrets what happened big time and wants to marry me more than ever, and that it even helped her to realize that her ex is not for her but that I am. She swears she hasnt talked to him since.
As she was telling me all this, I pulled out The System and read the section on Betrayal. I didnt blow up, but told Nicole that I was very angry. I also told her that if she ever does anything like that again, there would be no more me and her.
Nicole begged me to forgive her, but I told her that I was too angry to think straight, and that I needed to go and sleep on it, and that Id call her when I woke up. I will try to give her another chance, but Im wondering how I should go about it. Im thinking of telling her something like If youre absolutely positive that you still want to be with me and marry me, and that you will not ever think about doing something like this again, then I forgive you and we can move on.
What do you think, Doc?
Primo - who hopes to get back in control
Why in the world didnt you follow whats in my book when you needed it? You invested in the Dating Dictionary, didnt you? Some of you guys out there feel that just by having my books in your house, somehow the words will magically fly through the air and nestle between your ears. My friend, learning how to deal with women is a rough, tough practice that takes lots of discipline. So to invest in my book THE GREATEST TOOL YOU CAN EVER OWN WHEN IT COMES TO DATING AND WOMEN -- and not use it is simply unbelievable.
Now lets look at whats going on with Nicole. Youve got two problems here right off the bat. First of all, shes just a little girl and a ding-dong to boot, and number two, shes living out of town. So like my cousin Sal The Fish Love says, Oh, yeah, youre off to a great start! Those conditions would be okay if Nicole was deeply in love with you, but like my Uncle Jethro Love says, You cant trust 22-year-olds, boy!
Dude, when you hear the words time off, youre done, done, done. DONE. As in FOREVER. And what bothers me most was that you had my book. If you didnt have the book, I wouldnt be browbeating you, Primo. But it was sitting on your night stand, and look at what youve done here. You had a shot at a hottie and what did you do? You didnt do what it says to do in my book and now shes going to walk. Its over.
This girl might not know what she wants, but she sure as heck knows what she doesnt want. Of course something was missing in your relationship her high Interest Level! But the next day she changed her mind. So shes going to practice the yo-yo now, huh? Like my cousin Brother Love down in Watts says, Yo, dawg, why are you even talking to this girl? Primo, you should do two things right now. One, tell Nicole to forget your name. Two, tell her to forget your phone number.
Things havent been great between you and her, man. A girl says she wants time off and according to you, things are great? This girls treating you like a human boomerang. How could you possibly like being treated that way? So things arent so great. Its not just an oxymoron -- its stupid.
Of course Nicole met up with her ex-boyfriend. When a girl is bored, she starts giving out her home phone number to guys, but if theres no one around she goes back to her first love. They all do it. And of course they kissed at two in the morning in the back seat of his car! And youre taking all of this with a grain of salt? Youre giving her a hundred times too much credit, Primo!
You know why Nicole felt like she was going crazy? Because she was with two guys she doesnt love! But she claims that kissing her ex convinced her that she wanted you and not him. Well, that makes sense -- go and make out with some other guy and then youll know whom your true love is! Like the great Doctor Freud once said, Thats perfectly rational. But like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says, Once a cheater, always a cheater. Next! Maybe Nicole should go kiss the soccer team and see if any of those guys are for her.
Are you sure you read the section on Betrayal in my book? It says dont ever show the girl that youre angry. And it also says dont ever have a heavy, serious conversation with her. So youd better re-read Betrayal. It sounds like you missed a few things.
When you told Nicole there wasnt going to be any more you and her, was that the third or fourth ultimatum? Dont you know when youre out, Primo? Or like my cousin General Love says, What does this girl have to do, burn down your house?
How can you ever trust this girl? To you Psych majors, YOU CANT.
Remember, guys: once they stray, its adios, baby.
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