Menstuff® has compiled information, books and resources on the issue of violence.


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It’s not about mental illness: The big lie that always follows mass shootings by white males
Violence against women—it's a men's issue - Video 19:07
Violence Tax
Use a Gun, No More Fun
56 Times in 81 Seconds
Bad Girls - Women's Violence
Modeling Non-Violent Behavior
Road Rangers
Abusive Behaviors
Sticks and Stones - and School Yard Killings
Gender Bias Okayed by Circuit Court
Teens at Risk
Violent Victimization Rates by Sex, 1973-98
When Victimization becomes Invisible
Does the Sex of the Perpetrator Matter?
Snapshots of Children's Exposure to Community Violence
Anatomy Of A One Punch Knockout
KSU expert says male college students also victims of violence at girlfriends’ hands
Relationship Violence Common in College

Related Issues - Talking With Kids About Tough Issues, Abuse - Ritual, Abuse - Sexual, Bullies, Bullying, Bullying Girls, Circumcision, Cyberbullying, Domestic Violence, Hazing, Online Harrassment, Prisons, Sexual Harassment, Teacher's Pet, TV Violence, Violent Girls, Chic Fights, Womens' Violence, Really Bad Women, Women who Sexually Abuse Children, and Teacher's Pet
Books - Related topics of Abuse - Boys, Abuse - Children, Abuse - Ritual, Abuse - Sexual, Circumcision, Anger, Domestic Violence, Sexual Violence, Sexual Harassment,, Women's Violence, Violence
Journals - Emotional and Sexual Abuse and Trauma
Alternatives to Violence programs
Q&A Slide Guide on Gangs

A Violence Tax

Here's an idea. People pay extra to enjoy some freedoms. Cigarettes and alcohol have special taxes to pay for the outcome on society of those life styles. Why not charge a Violence Tax on video's, films, etc. that support or promote violence, especially those directed to the adolescent market. After all, society, women, children and men suffer at great cost from the results that these profitable ventures promote. Don't eliminate the freedom to purchase - just make it really expensive.

Use a Gun, No More Fun

In California, if you're 14 years or older and use a gun in conjunction with a crime, you'll get 10 to life. Life if you shoot someone with it. 20 years if you fire and miss. And 10 years just for using it without firing it. In Oregon, Measure 11 that went into effect April 1, 1995 says: If you are 15 or older and if you do any of 21 crimes in Oregon, you must go to prison for a long time! Murder is just one of the crimes. Some of the others are done everyday. Here are some examples.

Here is a list of all the Measure 11 crimes and how long you will stay in prison if you are found guilty. No probation!  No parole!  No early release!  Just prison. (Yrs/Mos):

Think first!  Remember, no probation, no parole, no early release!  Just prison.

Modeling Non-Violent Behavior

Children are not born violent, violence is learned. And according to Adults & Children Together (ACT) Against Violence, this learned behavior has often taken root before age 8.

Knowing that it is becoming increasingly difficult to prevent a child from being exposed to violence through media and outside the home, the campaign reminds that the earliest and strongest influencers of children are parents, caregivers and teachers.

The campaign's ad messages remind parents and other caregivers that their everyday actions and reactions are teaching ever-observant children to deal with life and it's obstacles in either positive or problematic ways.

Viewers are invited to visit the web site or call the organization to help them develop specific skills for positive role modeling and violence prevention.

The campaign is funded by the MetLife Foundation, and was originally launched in 2001. New work was released in July 2005.

Sponsor Organization: American Psychological Association, National Association for the Education of Young Children, MetLife Foundation Web Site: or or call 1-877-ACT-WISE or

56 Times in 81 Seconds (ich schleigh umher betrubt)

From the double CD Eleven Shadows, by Irian Jaya, comes this piece. Just as we saw the missiles over Bagdad and the murders in Tiananmen Square we saw the beating of Rodney King with batons on video. It was clear cut. 56 times in 81 seconds. "Something like this..." and we hear the 56 hits in 81 seconds with the singers in the background. Interesting that the sensitivity to atrocities came from Germany. It would appear that their is still great sensitivity to brutality from their past, while me may be numb to governmental violence in a way that their citizenry was in the 1930's . Just remember when you saw the video. "Don't go back to sleep" as Rumi would say. Remember, "56 times in 81 seconds." (See Free bumper sticker offer here.)


Road Rangers

Marin County, CA is targeting drivers who use exit lanes or shoulders to pass, flash their lights, cut in and out, flip off other drivers and generally comport themselves with more anger than brains. The CHP (California Highway Patrol) has received an extra $715,000 to pay CHP officers in four areas across the state patrolling on overtime only for road ragers.

Sticks and Stones and School Yard Killings

The front page of the April 21, 1999, San Francisco Chronicle read "Killing Rampage at School:  Suicide attack blamed on 2 students." Just two students? Or is it a wake-up call for all of us?

We can blame it on the availability of guns, or movies, television or war toys as innocent as GI Joe. We can even point, in this case, at Goth. But in doing that, I suggest we look where our other three fingers are pointing and take responsibility for the part we played in this scenario. Yes, all of us. For, you see, I think the problem goes much deeper that what the newspapers or "expert" psychologist are saying. The problem lies within virtually every home in America. While the solution may be more difficult, I think problem is very simple.

Name calling. Feeling insecure in our selves, or developing a dislike or even hate of people who are different from us (race, religion, sexual preference, and the hate list goes on), we start by passing on jokes that malign others, then name calling behind someone's back, then finally to their face. Names beyond the many raciest names we all know.

These killers in Littleton, Colorado weren't athletes, or pep squad leaders, or the popular kids at school. The "killers" at the previous school killings weren't either. But those are the people they targeted. And, I think, they just got tired of being called weirdo's, nerds, geeks, freaks, stupid, slobs, or whatever words the in-crowd uses to attack someone's self-esteem. After a while, these young men can't deal with it anymore and return the attack in the only way they can see that will stop the abuse.

The message they are sending is "Stop calling me names" and no one is listening. So, the name-calling and ridicule continue. And the communities involved start focusing on an action plan and gun control and fences around the schools and more security checks, more shakedowns, and the list goes on. While short-term those may be necessary, they are only short-term solutions.

We all must get actively involved with this problem. Really look at all the ways each of us becomes a perpetrator. Then, start teaching our children about the dangers of name calling and the importance of developing respect for everyone, especially those who are different in some way than we are. Outside the home by standing up and saying "Stop calling him (or her) names" or "I don't think that joke is funny" or "Stop sending me those emails." In school, send the name callers to the principles office.

As an adult, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me." But as a kid who doesn't "fit in," or look the part, or isn't as popular as "Joe cool," names not only hurt, they kill.

Possible Solutions

It can get frustrating as a parent or non-parent knowing what to do. And, while there are a number of good books and how to work to reduce teen violence, cultural violence and the shadow violence that lurks without each of us, many of us won't go to the effort of getting one of these books to start the work now.

In the meantime, the following are some steps you can take to stop violence among young children, from Parenting for Peace & Justice:

Speak out to your family, friends, and co-workers to develop an awareness of the "accepted" violence among teens and children, including name calling, insults, pushing, shoving and kicking.

Support conflict-resolution programs in your home, school and community to help children (and adults) learn now to solve problems without resorting to violence (hitting, kicking, throwing something, slamming doors, phones, pencils, etc.).

Volunteer in parent education classes or as a "resource parent" for young teen and first-time parents to help participants parent without resorting to violence. Volunteer for the teen crisis line, if you really want to get a reality check about what's happening to the youth in your community! If you're man enough, that is.

Help your children select nonviolent toys, television programs and movies. DON'T BUY WAR TOYS!!! Read books to your children that promote peaceful conflict resolution.

Speak out against movies and television programs that glamorize violence or make it funny. TV Violence

Lead by example. Children learn more from our actions than our words. (Don't Laugh at Me.)

Gender Bias Okayed by Circuit Court

The 9th US Circuit Court of Appeals puts it stamp of approval on bias against men in sentencing. A district judge had earlier concluded that prosecutors treated men more harshly than women when both were accused of being drug couriers. One Arizona study showed that prison sentences for men are longer and that 35% of women got probation without prison, compared to only 11% of men. Nevertheless, the Appeals Court said prosecutors should be given "extreme deferences" and "appropriate respect" when they decide to charge one person (men) and let another (women) off. The court told the district judge that the sentences he gave three men were too low. He had given them lower sentences to make them comparable to the sentencing of women. The court ordered him to raise the sentences. So much for equal protection under the law.

Teens at Risk

A study conducted by the Gallup International Institute found that 26% of teenagers had been hit or physically harmed by a parent or other adult in the home, and another 10% have been hit by an adult at school. Re: sexual abuse, 6% of teens say they have friends who have been sexually abused by someone in their households. The report also covers findings on drugs, alcohol abuse, teen smoking, health care, AIDS prevention, and abortion. Send to the Gallup International Institute, 47 Hulfish St, Princeton NY 08542 for a copy. 609.921.6200. See also Issues - Jailhouse Rock and Merchandise Slide Guides - Safe Dating Guide, AIDS Education Guide, STD Education Guide and Facts on Gangs.

Violent Victimization rates by Sex, 1973-98

Year Total Pop Victim (M/F)

1973 48.5 68.0 31.4
1974 49.1 69.4 31.3
1975 48.9 66.8 33.1
1976 48.5 65.8 33.3
1977 50.5 71.1 32.4
1978 50.2 70.0 32.8
1979 51.5 69.7 35.3
1980 49.4 68.1 33.0
1981 52.6 70.9 36.5
1982 51.0 66.9 36.9
1983 46.2 61.7 32.4
1984 46.2 60.6 33.4
1985 44.7 59.5 31.6
1986 41.9 54.3 30.9
1987 43.7 56.8 32.0
1988 44.2 55.0 34.4
1989 43.4 56.8 31.4
1990 44.0 57.6 32.0
1991 48.0 64.5 33.4
1992 47.8 59.3 37.2
1993 49.9 59.8 40.7
1994 51.8 61.1 43.0
1995 46.6 55.7 38.1
1996 42.0 49.9 34.6
1997 39.2 45.8 33.0
1998 36.6 43.1 30.4

National Crime Victimization Survey: 1973-1991 data adjusted to make data comparable to data after the redesign. Homicide data were calculated from the FBI's Supplementary Homicide Reports.

Snapshots of Children's Exposure to Community Violence


Global Move To Scale Up Response To Violence

The World Health Assembly has unanimously adopted a resolution which recommends urgent action to stem the public health impact of violence globally. During deliberations on the Resolution representatives from WHO s 192 Member States reflected on the devastating impact of violence on physical, mental and reproductive health and the vast amount of human and financial health resources required to respond to it.

Fear on Campus: The Problem and Prevalence of Stalking

Stalking on college campuses is occurring at an alarming rate and it now appears that college students are at greater risk of being stalked than other populations.

Violence in Baseball Emulates Hockey

Randall Simon, a Pittsburgh Pirate, has been issued a disorderly conduct citation and fined $432 for smacking a mascot over the head with a bat during last night's game against the Brewers in Milwaukee's Miller Park. During a between-innings race involving Brewers employees dressed in massive bratwurst, hot dog, Italian sausage, and Polish sausage outfits, Simon, a 240-pound first baseman, swung his bat at the head of the Italian sausage as the mascot passed the visitor's dugout. The blow knocked down the 19-year-old woman dressed in the costume and caused her to "receive injuries," according to this Milwaukee County sheriff's report. After the game, Simon, 28, was led from the stadium in handcuffs by sheriff's deputies and taken to the Milwaukee County Jail.

1. 2. 3.
1. Randall Simon takes baseball bat to team mascot (story above). 2. Vitali Klitschko TKO's in fight with Lennox Lewis. 3. Cubs pitcher Kyle Farnsworth punches Reds pitcher Paul Wilson as league decides not to enact rules similar to the NBA and NHL to cub fighting. We say, "Let's play ball without the brawl, children."

The WHO Violence Report: Does the Sex of the Perpetrator Matter?

Recently, we posted our analysis of the WHO's World Report on Violence and Health (1). Even though violence is a problem that predominantly affects men, we criticized the WHO Report as being biased because it emphasizes the less frequent instances of violence against women.

But some persons have taken issue with this conclusion. They argue that since men are more likely to be the perpetrators of violence, then isn't the emphasis on female victimization justified? In other words, shouldn't male-on-male violence be less worrisome than male-on-female violence?

Our response is that we believe the sex of the perpetrator is irrelevant to the issue. Consider these questions:  

1. Mothers are more likely than fathers to abuse their children. When daughters are being harmed, should society be less worried about that because it represents female-on-female abuse? 

2. In almost all cases, the persons who abduct infants from hospitals are female. When a woman abucts a baby girl from the hospital, is that less of a concern then when a woman robs a baby boy? 

3. Several recent books reveal that up to one-quarter of all lesbian relationships are affected by domestic violence (2-4). Should victims of lesbian partner aggression be ignored because they have have been involved in female-on-female violence? 

4. In Africa, the practitioners of female genital mutilation are female. Does that fact make female genital mutilation a less gruesome procedure? 

We believe the answer to all four questions is "No." Our compassion for the victim of abuse, aggression, or violence should not be diminished by the gender, race, or any other characteristic of the perpetrator. A person who has been harmed by violence warrants our concern, regardless of the sex of the person who caused the injury. 

So we come back to the assumption implicit in the WHO Report that male victims of violence deserve less attention and services than female victims -- doesn't this represent a pernicious example of a gender double-standard? 

Contact Information: Etienne Krug, World Health Organization, Department of Injuries and Violence Prevention, 20 Avenue Appia, CH-1211 Geneva 27, Switzerland. Call + 41 (22) 791 3480 or Fax + 41 (22) 791 4332. Cost of first-class postage from the United States: 80 cents


1. Men's Health America. The WHO Violence Report: When Victimization Becomes Invisible. October 17, 2002. menshealth/message/596

2. Girshick LB. Woman to woman sexual violence: Does she call it rape? Boston: Northeastern University Press, 2002. 

3. Kaschack E (editor). Intimate betrayal: Domestic violence in lesbian relationships. Haworth, 2002.

4. Ristock I. No more secrets: Violence in lesbian relationships. Routledge, 2002.

Super Bowl Bound Ravens Afraid to Play the Best

The Baltimore Raven's have said it themselves, basically. If they knock out the quarterback, maybe even end his career, they won't need to play against the very best. Sort of a hollow victory, if they win. Maybe the Giants should adopt the same strategy to level the playing field. Fair's fair. The Raven's talk about the "Great players" known for dirty playing. And they've purposefully, with premeditation, knocked out three quarterbacks during the play-offs. A lot of late hits. They don't seem to care about breaking the rules. They'd probably use a folding chair, if they could get hold of one. And, it doesn't seem like the fines are enough. Do we want the NFL to become the WWF? They'll probably end up there, or in prison. Off the field, their actions would bring felony charges. Maybe that's a fine that Tony Siragusa and his fellow thugs would understand. Then it would return the game of pro-football to a field of the best, not second string.

Sibling violence may have serious consequences

Brothers and sis!ters who fight like cats and dogs are not unusual, according to a Florida researcher. But the fact that many siblings fight does not mean it is harmless.

Health groups link media to child violence

Children love teen horror flicks, shoot-'em up interactive video games, hard-core rock and rap and risque television.

And in one of the most definitive statements yet on violence in American culture, four national health associations link the violence in television, music, video games and movies to increasing violence among children.

"Its effects are measurable and long-lasting," the four groups say in a statement. "Moreover, prolonged viewing of media violence can lead to emotional desensitization toward violence in real life."

The joint statement by the American Medical Association, the American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Psychological Association and the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry was to be the centerpiece of a public health summit Wednesday on entertainment violence.

"The conclusion of the public health community, based on over 30 years of research, is that viewing entertainment violence can lead to increases in aggressive attitudes, values and behaviors, particularly in children," the organizations' statement says.

Advocating a code of conduct for the entire entertainment industry, Sen. Sam Brownback, a Republican, compared the statement to the medical community declaring that cigarettes can cause cancer.

"I think this is an important turning point," said Brownback. "Among the professional community, there's no longer any doubt about this. For the first time, you have the four major medical and psychiatric associations coming together and stately flatly that violence in entertainment has a direct effect on violence in our children."

The Motion Picture Association of America and the National Association of Broadcasters refused to comment Tuesday on the medical associations' statement.

The four health professional groups left no doubt about their feelings in the statement:

--"Children who see a lot of violence are more likely to view violence as an effective way of settling conflicts. Children exposed to violence are more likely to assume that acts of violence are acceptable behavior," it said.

--"Viewing violence can lead to emotional desensitization toward violence in real life. It can decrease the likelihood that one will take action on behalf of a victim when violence occurs."

--"Viewing violence may lead to real-life violence. Children exposed to violent programming at a young age have a higher tendency for violent and aggressive behavior later in life than children who are not so exposed."

Brownback said he hopes the statement will convince lawmakers that something has to be done about media violence. And, "I hope parents will look at this and say that they're going to have to police their children's entertainment violence content the same way they police what their children eat and other health issues."

One entertainment violence monitoring group, The Lion and Lamb Project in nearby Bethesda, Maryland, cheered the statement.

"Right now, the message we're sending children in the media is that violence is OK ... that it's part of life and sometimes it's even funny," executive director Daphne White said. "We're even using violence for humor now."

Jeff Bobeck, a spokesman for the National Association of Broadcasters, said television now has V-chips and a rating system to help parents take control of what their children watch. "We think more parents need to control their remote control," Bobeck said.

But White said the entertainment industry markets video games and toys to children based on R-rated movies, has increased the violence in movies and shows that are rated for children and even previewed adult-oriented movies during children's G-rated movies. "The industry has been actively marketing adult stuff to children while saying it's the adults' fault," she said.

On the Net: Motion Picture Association of America:
National Association of Broadcasters:
The Lion and the Lamb Project:
Sen. Sam Brownback:

Bobby Knight - How Contrite - Good Night!

What do Knight, Spreewell, Tyson, Davis, Ditka and the recent U.S. Olympic (Pro) Hockey Team, to name just a few, have in common. They are all out-of-control and want us to accept that that's just the way it is. Too harsh?  I think not. On Mother's Day, when many metro newspapers were doing page 5 and page 9 stories on "Violence in Youth Sports Spreading", "Foul Play in Youth Sports", and "Violence in Sports Spreading in Youth Ranks," in addition to all the stories on the Million Mom March, our white-haired darling Bobby Boy got Front Sports Page mention in all of these metro papers and then some. You can't pay PR firms to get this kind of coverage, so could it be the alumni association flexing their muscle or sports writers coming to his defense (James Prichard of the AP was the BK positive author of most of them)?  I wonder. Here's a man who is reported to have grabbed former player Neil Reed by the throat, attacked a former assistant last November, attacked an SID, throwing a vase at a wall when he couldn't get his way with an IU secretary, firing a starter's pistol at a reporter, shooting a friend in a hunting incident and hot reporting it, throwing an LSU fan in a dumpster, fighting in a parking lot with a diner who took exception to a too-loud racial characterization by Knight, hitting a Puerto Rican policeman during the Pan Am Games, kicking his own son during a game, and spending a lifetime in smelly gyms bullying other people's children. A man who once said "If rape is inevitable, relax and enjoy it." Who put a tampon in a player's locker to motivate him. The record seems to stand on its own. Men end up in prison for less than what he's done, though he did get 6 months for the Puerto Rico incidence, which has yet to be served. I guess it doesn't matter if you're in Indiana and you win basketball games, though let the record also show he hasn't won a national championship in 13 years

In his 330 word statement he said he was "trying" to control his emotions. Emotions are okay, in fact encouraged. He needs to understand the difference between emotions and control his otherwise out-of-control behavior. He said he needed to be more diplomatic. What he needs is 26-52 weeks in an alternatives to violence program. And, he needs to stop "trying" to do it and "Do it". Coaches strangling players. Players strangling coaches. Maybe we should just turn off the TV and wait until these athletes can get it together, if they want to, and then see if we can enjoy sharing a basketball with our kids again, sans Bobby Knight.

Can We Stop School Shootings?

The August, 1999 issue of Psychology Today addresses this topic.

Some Things Parents Can Do

From the 3/20/00 Newsweek article on children's violence, the following suggestions were made on things the parents can do:

Remember That You are your child's primary role model. If you carry a gun, you could send your kid the message that guns solve disputes. (Sony Brings You: Dropping Bombs on Your Moms.)

You've Gotta See This!

The two magazines above on the left rolled by next to each other at check out and I see what you see. Jennifer Lopez pointing a finger at you with the headline "Line of Fire", and Newsweek's cover on a 6 year old boy killing his classmate. When I get home, I had also purchased Psychology Today for an article on stress but the woman on the cover looks more angry to me. Five years ago we wouldn't have seen an angry woman on the cover of a respected publication. And, if you read the story on the six-year-old shooter, the reason he wanted to scare her is that she hit him. Ask any teenage boy if he's ever been hit or slapped by a girl. I wouldn't be surprised if it well surpasses the number of teenage girls slapped or hit by boys. In saying that, it doesn't excuse anyone to act out revenge on someone else. everyone must take responsibility for their own violence and not point the figure somewhere else. Hitting and slapping are physical violence and it shouldn't matter which sex is doing it. And this culture glorifying women using physical violence against men, who they know can't do anything about it without a felony charge. TV is full of examples that women are giving young girls and their daughters. "He deserved it" is not longer a valid excuse. It's still battery. If doesn't deserve a violent act in return, but it should expect the batterer to be punished. If this gets across to the kids, maybe some real progress can be made in making this world safe for children. When everyone takes responsibility for their own violence and gets help. And, hopefully, the gun manufacturers will introduce some of the measures they have been testing before the people get angry enough to put them out of business all together. Some things parents can do.

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O! it is excellent to have a giant's strength; but it is tyrannous to use it like a giant. - William Shakespeare

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