Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

FEBRUARY 14

National Condom Day

 

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

February 14 - National Condom Day * St. Valentine's Day /Lupercalia Day, Old Roman festival dedicated to God-Goddess as Faunus-Fauna, celebrating love - heterosexual and homosexual; merged with the Christian feast of St. Valentine (US). The Mystic's Wheel of the Year. Say "I love you" in your significant other's language of their heritage.* Valentines for Vets Week - America's National Salute to Hospitalized Veterans Feb 14-20 * St. Valentine's Day Massacre. Al Capone's gang is suspected of gunning down 7 members of "Bugs" Moran's gang in Chicago on this date in 1929. * The first electronic digital Eniac Computer introduced (1946). It occupied a room the size of a gymnasium and contained nearly 18,000 vacuum tubes. * President James Polk became the first US president to be photographed while in office (1849). * Salman Rushdie's Death Sentence (1989). On the following day, Ayatollah Khomeini offered a $1 million reward for execution of his sentence. * The robot spacecraft Near Earth Asteroid Rendezvous finished circling the asteroid Eros (2000) Eros is called a near-Earth asteroid because its orbit crosses that of Earth and poses a potential collision danger. * SMM (US) unmanned Delta rocket, a Solar Maximum Mission Observatory, launched on this date (1980) to study solar flares. * Birthdays: Jack Benny, Gregory Hines, Skeezix Wallet, Carl Bernstein, Drew Bledsoe, Enrico Colantoni, Hugh Downs, Zach Galligan, Andrew Prine, and Teller.

DAILY THOUGHTS

Love/Forgiveness. Love means not ever having to say you're sorry. - Erich Segal, Love Story. I like to think of love as one giant eraser, rubbing out all the suffering, sorrow and ugliness between people. When you love someone you see their scars as stars and rub until the beautiful surface that lies beneath the emotional scribbling of pain, shame and blame shines through and you can see your own reflection. Like a weathered barn, a smooth piece of driftwood, a kitchen counter with perfect ring-shaped coffee stains, love makes everything seem beautiful. I tried to explain this to my roommate last month when my rent check bounced, but unfortunately, to her, love is an indelible marker, you know, the kind that not even all-temperature Cheer or a nuclear holocaust can wipe out, so my love eraser didn't stand much of a chance. I stood my ground. I told her that someone who really loved we would accept me for who I am, rubber checks and all. They would accept my inner child, my innocence and my bad credit rating, but all she would accept was my key and a promise to have my things out by Monday. I forgive myself for my past. I'm sure others will forgive me, too, and if they don't, I can move cross country, grow a bear, and get an unlisted phone number. Meditations for Men Who Do Next to Nothing: and would like to do even less

The Language of Gloves:  In the days of chaperones, young women relied on glove-speak:  Dropping both gloves (I love you); Turning the glove inside out (I hate you), Holding the tips down (I wish to meet you); Striking the gloves on chin (I love another); Biting the tips (I wish to be rid of you). The Old Farmer's Almanac

When I have an orgasm, the man tries to make it longer or more intense. It always has the opposite result. Just stop for a minute. - Kelly, 34 The Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

Adolescence for the Vietnam Generation (born 1946-55) "evolved into a cult, to be prolonged, enjoyed, and commercially catered to as never before" wrote adolescent experts Grace and Fred M. Hechinger. These adolescents achieved dominion over the music and movie industries for the first time in history. They soon expressed their collective personality: idealistic, narcissistic, antiestablishment, hairy, horny and preferably high. New Passages

Robert Weaver is sworn in as administrator of the Housing and Home Finance Agency on this day in 1961, becoming the highest-ranking African American in the federal government. African American History

Parent and Spouse. Being a parent doesn't have to mean sacrificing your marriage. For most of us, taking care of a new baby is a 24-hour-a-day job, with a few catnaps thrown in for survival. Forget candlelight dinners or long conversations at the end of the day - you're either exhausted or changing diapers. But while being immersed in the baby's needs is natural and essential for the first nine months or so, by about nine months, the baby can withstand a little frustration and parents don't always need to jump at the first whimper. That's when most couples start moving back toward each other. Balancing the kids' needs with your own can keep you or get you back on track with your spouse. State your feelings and needs in clear, direct ways. An carve out time to be together, focusing on your "coupleness." Parents Tips & Tricks

Things to Be Happy About:  Chocolate-covered strawberries. A handmade Valentine card. Thinking good thoughts. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

 Love comes from the being and is a oneness with all humankind. It makes life worth living and people worth relating to in your life. Loving the lovable is easy; it's embracing the unlovable that is a challenge. If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

 "Love cures people - both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it." Dr. Karl Menninger. Do yourself some good and give some love away today. Stress Busters

 Talk with your kids today about "love", the non-sexual kind. Do they have friends that they "love"? Suggest that they made a card for those friends. Glue a stick of gum onto a heart cut from red or pink paper. Under the gum write "I chews you, Valentine." Make one for your spouse or lover while you're at it. To Do Today

 If you shoot for the stars and hit the moon, it's okay. But you've got to shoot for something. - Robert Townsend. Win the Day!

Remember that love changes everything. Life's Little Instruction Calendar

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?  - Lily Tomlin. Anyone who's a great kisser, I'm always interested in. - Cher The Old Farmer's Almanac

Layout tools are used to make cutting and assembly lines, working from accurate measurements. Squares help you check and mark 90- and 45-degree angles. Bevels can be set at any angle. Levels tell whether work is truly horizontal (level) or vertical (plumb). A chalkline marks long, straight lines, and a plumb bob indicates a point that is directly below another point. These tools are as important as a tape and folding rule.  Stanley do-it-yourself Handyman Hints

Happy Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day can be very commercial and materialistic. It can feel like a day of obligation rather than celebration. So make sure you personalize how the two of you will thank Cupid for bringing your together. Celebrating your love doesn't even need to cost you much. You can get some three-by-five cards and some of those stickers (with hearts, roses and anything else that's meaningful) at the stationery store and then create several different cards that you can leave around the house in special places to be discovered throughout the day. You can make her favorite dessert and decorate it with white, rd and pink - whipped cream, roses and little heart candies. Whatever you do, make sure you are honoring the two of you, and your very specific relationship. Don't just go but flowers and candy. Put your heart and soul and creativity into it - that's what makes it fun for you both. Happy Valentine's Day! "On Valentine's Day, my son and his friends prepared dinner for their girlfriends. The women were overwhelmed by their actions. Each one had a rose on her plate and a heart balloon tied to the back of her chair." Karla Kelly Opening to Love 365 Days a Year

El Cupido (kooPEEdoh) Cupid. La flecha de Cupido ya pego. Cupid's arrow strikes again.   Living Language

And to close the thoughts for today, we leave you with Sigmund Freud's writings in The Sexual Aberrations: "One special form of contact, which consists of mutual approximation of the mucous membranes of the lips in a kiss, has received a sexual value among the civilized nations, though the parts of the body do not belong to the sexual apparatus and merely form the entrance to the digestive tract."

TODAY'S ISSUE: VALENTINE'S DAY - IT'S NOT TOO LATE

 The first part of this is a reprint from our February 1 Daily Thoughts. The second part is an emergency list if you haven't done anything and feel you should.

Part 1:

You are "expected" to do something romantic on that one day of the year, like that will make-up for doing nothing on most of the other 364 days. It's like Going to church on Easter because it's expected. Or working in a soup kitchen over the holidays. "I did my bit in the holiday spirit." You're expected to be in the holiday spirit then. but those people still need to eat the other 364 days a year. Were you really thinking of them and wanting to feel good yourself? Do what isn't expected, it may mean a lot more to others.

One of the things a great little book called Romantic Mischief talks about is to look at Valentine's Day a bit differently and we quote: "Instead of actually being romantic on Valentine's Day, why don't you use the day as a chance to rededicate yourself to the ideals of love? Make a Valentine's Day Resolution. You could resolve to call more often. Be more considerate. Listen better. Give more of your time. Stop making excuses. Reserve weekends for each other."

If you must do the expect and be "romantic" on Valentine's day, here are some other suggestions from Romantic Mischief.

"Give your lover one card every hour."

"Send a dozen roses. Make sure there are eleven red roses and one white rose. Here's the note: "'In every bunch there's one who stands out. And you are that one."

"Buy piles of those little candy conversation hearts. Fill the sink with them. Fill your lover's purse or briefcase. Fill their favorite cereal box with them."

"Call your lover every hour on the hour...all day long!...just to say 'I love you!.'" (Casio makes a watch that you can set to go off every hour. - Editor)

"Learn to say 'I love you' in Japanese ("Ai shite imasu"); in Russian ("Ya lyublyu tyebya"); in Eskimo ("Nagligivaget".)" (If you know your lover's heritage, learn how to say it in their ancestral language. - Editor)

"Some romantic inscriptions for notes and gifts:

A.A.F. (Always And Forever)

G.M.F.L. (Geese Mate For Life)

A.T.S.B.O. (And They Shall Be One)

T.L.Y.T.I.E.T.T.L.Y.M. (Ask a Beatles fan. Hint: From Abbey Road)."

Here's to doing the unexpected. Imagine how your life might be different if, everyday, romance was part of it.

Part 2:

By the way, if you forgot today was Valentine's Day, and it matters, it might not be too late. Check out some of these sites:

  • Jungle roses - giant, stunning, exotic, fragrant blooms. www.jungleroses.com
  • Love at first site - computer generated cards and advice from the Love Mechanic along with classic love letters. www.valentine.com
  • Good Vibrations - allows you to order a wide range of erotica and sex toys. www.goodvibes.com

Valentines for Vets Week - America's National Salute to Hospitalized Veterans Feb 14-20
Every day, approximately 100,000 veterans are treated in VA Medical facilities. Some of them are without family, friends or visitors. You can mail valentines to the nearest VA medical center, or drop them off in person. The addresses of the facilities can be obtained by looking in the telephone directory, or by calling VA's toll-free number, 800-827-1000, or from the VA's Web site at www.va.gov or the VA facility locator at: www.va.gov/stations97/guide/home.asp?DIVISION=ALL

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Be sure to have fun with your loved ones today! What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

In Defense of Food: An eater's manifesto by Pollan, Michael Pollan. Because in the so-called Western diet, food has been replaced by nutrients, and common sense by confusion - most of what we're consuming today is no longer the product of nature but of food science. The result is what the author calls the American Paradox: The more we worry about nutrition, the less healthy we seem to become. With this book, the author proposes a new (and very old) answer to the question of what we should eat that comes down to seven simple but liberating words: Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants. His bracing and eloquent manifesto shows us how we can start making thoughtful food choices that will enrich our lives, enlarge our sense of what it means to be healthy, and bring pleasure back to eating. Penguin, www.penguin.com, 2009 ISBN 978-0-14-311496-3

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Just One Thing - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

February is Heart Disease Prevention (Healthy Heart), National Children's Dental Health, Ethnic Equality and *National African-American History Month - a time to honor all peoples and their positive traditions; time to meditate on the equality of all peoples, on the respect due to them and God-Goddess manifesting as African, Asian, European, Latin, Middle Eastern, Native American and Oceanic. The Mystic's Wheel of the Year 2000, AMD/Low Vision Awareness; *American Heart; A Day of Hearts: Child Awareness; International Boost Self-Esteem; International Expect Success; Library Lovers', Marfan Syndrome Awareness; National Children's Dental Health; National Sign Up for Summer Camp; National Weddings; National Wild Bird Feeding; and Plant the Seeds of Greatness Month.

Jan 29-Feb 4: *National Consumer Protection Week. Jan 30-Feb 3: Mid-Winter/Candlemas. Feb 2-9: I Hate Financial Planning Awareness Week. Feb 3-9: Cardiac Rehabilitation Week. Feb 4-10: International Personal and Business Coaching: National School Counseling Week. Feb 6-13: Art of Communication Week. Feb 10-16: Celebration of Love; Enabled Entrepreneurs; Freelance Writers Appreciation; Heart Failure Awareness; Home for Birds; Materials Testing; National Child Passenger Safety Awareness; National Family, Career and Community Leaders of America; National Resurrect Romance Week. Feb 1-17: International Flirting Week. Feb 12-19: National Condom Week. Feb 16-23: National FFA Week. Feb 17-23: International Friendship Week. Feb 18-22: Brotherhood-Sisterhood Week. Feb 19-26: Eating Disorders Awareness Week. Feb 22-24: Second Honeymoon Weekend. Feb 25-Mar 1: Read Me Week. Feb 25-Mar 3: Telecommuter Appreciation Week. Feb 1: Candlemas; Ground Hog Day. Feb 2: National Men's Grooming Day. Feb 3: Torture Abolition Day. Feb 4:  Weathermen's Day. Feb. 5: Dump Your "Significant Jerk"; Pay-a-Compliment Day. Feb 6: National Girls and Women in Sports; Wave All Your Fingers at Your Neighbors Day. Feb 7: Laugh and Grow Rich Day. Feb 8: National "DAV" Day. Feb 10: Be Electrific; Motivation; Satisfied Staying Single Day. Feb 11: Lost Penny Day. Feb 12: Black Love; Get a Different Name Day. Feb 13: Race Relations; Read to Your Child Day. Feb 14: Congenital Heart Defect Awareness; National Have-A-Heart; Heart 2 Heart; St.Valentine's Day. Feb 15: Remember the Maine Day. Feb 16: Who Shall I Be Day. Feb 17: National PTA Founders' Day.. Feb 18: President's Day. Feb 19: Student Volunteer Day. Feb 24: Children's Day. Feb 25: For Pete's Sake Day. Feb 27: Spay USA; Paczki Day. Feb 29: Bachelors' Day

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

National Missing Children's Day
Help find a missing child!
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24-Hour Hotline

 *    *    *
Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.



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