Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

FEBRUARY 17

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001
 

Photo of the Week
Gordon Wiltsie/Adventure Photo & Film
Achieve Your Dreams

February 17 - On this day in 1959, the U.S. Navy launches the Vanguard 2, a 21.5-lb. satellite - the first weather station in space. * After a siege that lasted almost a year and a half, Fort Sumter in South Carolina returned to Union hands on this date (1865). * American Indiana of the Chiricahua (Apache) tribe was leader of a small band of warriors whose devastating raids in Arizona, New Mexico and Mexico caused the US Army to send 5,000 men to recapture him. He was captured and confined at Fort Sill, OK where he died (1909) after dictating the story of his life for publication. * * Birthdays:  Michael Jeffrey Jordan, Tommy Moe, Walter Lanier Barber, Arcangelo Corelli, Rene Theophile Hyancinthe Laennec, Thomas Malthus, Samuel Sidney McClure, Raphael Peale, Alan Bates (Arthur Bates), James Nathaniel (Him) Brown, Ronald DeVoe, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Lee Hoiby, Hal Holbrook (Harold Rowe, Jr.), Barry Humphries, Richard Karn, Lou Diamond Phillips. . *SPECIAL Shauna Wilson Mora

DAILY THOUGHTS

The Whole Man. They that be whole need not a physician. - Matthew 9:12. I am complete and whole. When I hold a child in my arms, I express my manhood. When I cry on the shoulder of another man, my tears are a part of my manliness. I am complete, just as I am. I don't need any more of me than I already have. It is not merely "womanly" to be tender and loving; it is manly as well. I am a man, and to love freely is my natural way. It is not just my "feminine side" that loves beauty and great art; it is me, a whole man, enjoying and expressing his life. I claim the sensitive parts of myself - my birthright as a whole man. A Quiet Strength: Meditations on the Masculine Soul

Under the Influence of the Program, we are able to experience changes in our attitude that we probably would have found impossible when we were using. Here are some of the changes I am working on these days: 1. I try to consider the other person's point of view. And the other person's feelings. 2. I try to understand that other people often overlook my point of view. And my feelings. 3. I don't declare war when they do. 4. I try to say yes before I say no. 5. Even though I can think of three good excuses, I try to say yes before I say no. 6. Even though it means a change in my plans, I try to say yes before I say no. 7. Even though I feel I should be granted the Noble Peace Prize for saying yes, I do so humbly, without fanfare, without calling attention to myself. 8. I don't try to do everything at once. 9. Every day I am willing to let go of one thing that I feel I must absolutely do. 10. Can I remember everything I absolutely had to do yesterday? Did I do those things? Does it matter whether they got done? 11. Have I laughed at myself today? 12. Have I let someone else laugh at me? 13. Have I thanked them for laughing at me? 14. Was I at least not rude? Stepping Stones to Recovery for Men

That shower massager may feel good to you, but it makes a guy feel like he's been kicked in the nuts. - Eric, 22 Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

Just as it is difficult in reading the story of Daphne and Apollo not to side with one or the other, so in life it is not easy to give assent to attractions of both intimacy and solitude. Soul Mates

If you fell down yesterday, stand up today. - H.G. Wells. Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About:  Wishing on all the stars. A salsa-and-chips snack. Uplifting feelings. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

Simply noticing your behavior can bring you to awareness. When you observe your actions as an objective spectator, you remove the filter of self-judgement and allow yourself to see the patterns that you are repeating. As you watch yourself in a variety of situations and notice similar actions and reactions, you bring to light the common thread attached to the necessary lesson. If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

 If you are an effective manager of self, your discipline comes from within: it is a function of your independent will. You are a disciple, a follower, of your own deep values and their source. And you have the will, the integrity, to subordinate your feelings, your impulses, young moods to those values. Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

Which gay American author spent his entire literary career writing and rewriting one famous book of poems?  Gay & Lesbian Calendar (Answer below.)

Rethink your use of your cell phone. Many people have stopped talking on the phone while driving because of near-miss accidents that occurred when engaged in a heavy-duty conversation while barreling down the highway at sixty-five miles an hour. Safety aside, there's the sheer lunacy of committing ourselves to yet again doing at least two things at the same time. Have we really gotten that busy? Simplify Your Life (Editor: "Yes" is the wrong answer, if you've been listening.)

Telephones are meant to be a convenience rather than a nuisance. To avoid being interrupted by phone calls all day long, use an answering machine or caller I.D. and pick up only it it's someone you want to talk to at that moment. Salespeople generally won't leave a message, and others you can call back when it's convenient for you. Stress Busters

Suggestion for your young daughter. Top a colorful baseball hat with fun designs. Invite friends to decorate hats with jewels and puff paint. Wear them on weekend. Be creative. To Do Today

Believe you are defeated, believe it long enough, and it is likely to become a fact. - Norman Vincent Peale. Win the Day!

As you make your way through life, leave a trail worth following. Life's Little Instruction Calendar

Necessary Friction. You may know that building a muscle requires stressing that muscle through exercise, and the growth occurs in the healing. Well, you are no different. In order to grow spiritually and personally, to become stronger, you have to be stretched. In order to let your brilliance shine, you have to be healed of old, disempowering wounds. The trials of romantic love are the perfect workout lab for that transformational process. The friction of your differences is God's gift to your soul work. You don't have to pay anyone to create it or supply equipment for it. The friction comes with any intense romance, once the honeymoon phase is over. Now, in order to learn to love through and through, the natural conflicts of intimacy will expose your self-centered impulses, defensive instincts and the desire to hurt back when you've been hurt. Those arise from old wounds that need healing. As you go through this alchemical process, the diamond that you are will by cut, honed, buffed and polished to its brilliance. "The diamond cannot be polished without friction, nor the man perfected without trials." Chinese Proverb Opening to Love 365 Days a Year

La Divisa (deBEEsah) Hard currency. Hay que pagar en divisas. You have to pay in hard currency.  Living Language

Answer:  Walt Whitman (1819-1892), author of Leaves of Grass.

*SPECIAL : Shauna Wilson Mora (1955) After years of work with Teen and Abuse Hotlines, her own12 step recovery, workshops, therapy and trainings she was able to successfully leave a marriage of 17 years where she was battered, and create workshops and seminars that help men and women reconcile their differences and come from a place of forgiveness and freedom. One of those for men is Healing the Mother Wound® See www.motherwound.com

 

TODAY'S ISSUE: ACTIVITY

Life is Spirit's novel. Let Spirit write it. - Isaac Bashevis Singer

Men who do too much have much in common, but one of our major commonalties is our inability to "let go." We dream that we control our lives, and while we're awake we're certain of it.

If, as some assert, control is a myth, then that should give many of us cause for celebration. That doesn't mean we can't create our destiny, but we do need to loosen the reins a bit, let the plot unfold.

Think for a moment of the intricacy of each day of your life. There is so much more that goes into our lives than the events we control. Our efforts to control and write the shooting script for our lives shouldn't be abandoned. But we do need to allow our sense of control to free us; to feel a sense of uncertainty and revel in it.

Today I will let the hours unfold. I'll throw away whatever script I had filed away and enjoy the uncertainty, the randomness of an unplanned, unscheduled twenty-four hours. Meditations For Men Who Do Too Much

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Keep a list of friends to call to have fun with or to talk over problems. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

 

BOOK OF THE WEEK

Jeff Kinney's latest Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days, 2009 . Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The last straw 2009 Also see Diary of a Wimpy Kid:, 2007 ; Roderick Rules 2008 ; and Do it Yourself Book 2008 . A very fun series and good lessons for fathers of kids, especially boys, who aren't into macho endeavors. Good for all kids to get a sense of some of the trials and tribulations of a not-so-macho boy and ways to handle it. It's fun.

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Just One Thing - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

February is Heart Disease Prevention (Healthy Heart), National Children's Dental Health, Ethnic Equality and *National African-American History Month - a time to honor all peoples and their positive traditions; time to meditate on the equality of all peoples, on the respect due to them and God-Goddess manifesting as African, Asian, European, Latin, Middle Eastern, Native American and Oceanic. The Mystic's Wheel of the Year 2000, AMD/Low Vision Awareness; *American Heart; A Day of Hearts: Child Awareness; International Boost Self-Esteem; International Expect Success; Library Lovers', Marfan Syndrome Awareness; National Children's Dental Health; National Sign Up for Summer Camp; National Weddings; National Wild Bird Feeding; and Plant the Seeds of Greatness Month.

Jan 29-Feb 4: *National Consumer Protection Week. Jan 30-Feb 3: Mid-Winter/Candlemas. Feb 2-9: I Hate Financial Planning Awareness Week. Feb 3-9: Cardiac Rehabilitation Week. Feb 4-10: International Personal and Business Coaching: National School Counseling Week. Feb 6-13: Art of Communication Week. Feb 10-16: Celebration of Love; Enabled Entrepreneurs; Freelance Writers Appreciation; Heart Failure Awareness; Home for Birds; Materials Testing; National Child Passenger Safety Awareness; National Family, Career and Community Leaders of America; National Resurrect Romance Week. Feb 1-17: International Flirting Week. Feb 12-19: National Condom Week. Feb 16-23: National FFA Week. Feb 17-23: International Friendship Week. Feb 18-22: Brotherhood-Sisterhood Week. Feb 19-26: Eating Disorders Awareness Week. Feb 22-24: Second Honeymoon Weekend. Feb 25-Mar 1: Read Me Week. Feb 25-Mar 3: Telecommuter Appreciation Week. Feb 1: Candlemas; Ground Hog Day. Feb 2: National Men's Grooming Day. Feb 3: Torture Abolition Day. Feb 4:  Weathermen's Day. Feb. 5: Dump Your "Significant Jerk"; Pay-a-Compliment Day. Feb 6: National Girls and Women in Sports; Wave All Your Fingers at Your Neighbors Day. Feb 7: Laugh and Grow Rich Day. Feb 8: National "DAV" Day. Feb 10: Be Electrific; Motivation; Satisfied Staying Single Day. Feb 11: Lost Penny Day. Feb 12: Black Love; Get a Different Name Day. Feb 13: Race Relations; Read to Your Child Day. Feb 14: Congenital Heart Defect Awareness; National Have-A-Heart; Heart 2 Heart; St.Valentine's Day. Feb 15: Remember the Maine Day. Feb 16: Who Shall I Be Day. Feb 17: National PTA Founders' Day.. Feb 18: President's Day. Feb 19: Student Volunteer Day. Feb 24: Children's Day. Feb 25: For Pete's Sake Day. Feb 27: Spay USA; Paczki Day. Feb 29: Bachelors' Day

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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