Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

JUNE 4

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
Bill Hatcher/Adventure Photo & Film
Achieve Your Dreams

June 4 - International Men's Month.* United Nationals International Day of Innocent Children Victims of Aggression. Day to mourn the massacre of the peaceful, pro-democracy protesters in Tiananmen Square, Beijing, China (1989). Under cover of darkness, troops opened fire on the assembled crows and armored personnel carriers rolled into the square crushing many of the students as they lay sleeping in their tents.* Angela Davis, black activist and professor, was found not guilty (1972) by an all-white jury of murder, kidnapping and conspiracy charges resulting from the Aug 7, 1970 fatal shooting of Judge Harold Haley during an attempted escape and kidnapping. First Pulitzer Prizes awarded (1917) The US 9th Army entered the southern suburbs of Rome as the last of the German rearguard retreated from Mussolini's former capital (1944) * The Battle of Midway begins, leading to an important U.S. victory over Japan in 1942. * Independence Day in Tonga. * Birthdays: Noah Wyle, Bruce Dern, Parker Stevenson, Dennis Weaver, George III, Gene Barry (Eugene Klass), Keith David, Robert Merrill, Scott Wolf.

DAILY THOUGHTS

2 Years - Who's the Boss?  Toddlers want to be in charge of what they wear and eat, where they go, and what they do once they get there. It doesn't matter if their orders are totally impractical or intensely self-centered. Try to encourage your toddler's independence by providing opportunities for him to make some of his own decisions. At the same time, set clear limits. Toddlers who aren't given firm guidelines for their behavior may constantly issue demands just to see what the boundaries are. If you handle a toddler's bossy temperament with both firmness and kindness, he'll soon see that there are better ways of getting what he wants than demanding it. Family Feelings

In 1996, Connecticut Governor John Rowland refused to sign a proclamation declaring June to be Gay Pride Month because the resolution mentioned transsexuals and drag queens. Gay & Lesbian Calendar

They didn't want it good, they wanted it on Wednesday - Robert Heimleur. Artists, writers, photographers - creative people in general - view workaholism differently than most of us. Many believe that an inner fire fuels their passion to produce, that painting a large canvas for twenty hours without a break is an act of artistic passion, not one of a work addict. On the other hand, when art meets commerce, and has business to conduct, there can be a clash of great magnitude. Business wants it Tuesday, under budget and perfect in the first draft. Art says: I'm in process, rushing is contradictory to that process. If you want it good, it will come when it's finished.

I need to think about the clash between art (my heart and my head) and commerce (my need for outer stability and sustenance). I want to investigate the possibility of a balance of these diametrically opposed forces. Meditations For Men Who Do Too Much

On this day in 1904 Charles R. Drew is born in Washington, D.C. He will establish the first blood plasma bank. African American History

Labor is the curse of the world, and nobody can meddle with it without becoming proportionately brutified. - Nathaniel Hawthorne. Has civilization really progressed?  Our prehistoric ancestors risked their lives hunting to provide food for the clan. Today, we risk the freeways at rush hour. The ancient tribes of Europe, Asia and Africa slaughtered each other to secure their enemies' land and resources for themselves. Today, we park in loading zones and Handicapped Only spaces to get a jump on anybody else who was thinking of buying a few cases of antifreeze at the Walgreens dollar day sale. It seems we are still engaged in a ruthless, barbarous struggle to increase our riches and engine temperature at the expense of our fellow beings. Wouldn't it be more civilized to avoid contributing to those bad vibes on the freeway and just sleep in today?  And if parking is a problem, send your little sister on her bike to pick up your lottery tickets and Alka-Sletzer. Park yourself on the porch, where you can't do any harm. If it's here today, it'll be here tomorrow, so what's your hurry? Meditations for Men Who Do Next to Nothing: and would like to do even less

Life is full of choices. Make some. Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About:  The smell of fresh basil. Minimalism. Uncritical parents. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

It's hard to measure a crooked line. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

 All the well-meaning advice in the world won't amount to a hill of beans if we're not addressing the real problem. And we'll never get to the problem if we're so caught up in our own autobiographies, our own paradigms, that we don't take off our glasses long enough to see the world from another point of view. Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

If you're moving toward inner simplicity, you're probably already cutting back on many of the diversions that may previously have occupied a lot of your time, such as television, movies, videos, noisy bars, and crowded restaurants. You may find that the entertainment aspects of the inner realms are not only much more satisfying, but they lave you feeling refreshed and rejuvenated.  Simplify Your Life

Exercise your sense of humor today. Learn a new joke (search "humor" on the Net or browse through a joke book) and share it with three friends. The laughter will do you all good. Stress Busters

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. - Albert Einstein. Win the Day!

El martillo (mahrTEEyoh) Hammer. Deje de usar ese martillo!  Stop that hammering! Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: CULTURE, HUMOR, THE MEDIA, MUSIC, POETRY, WRITING

When conscious people spread unconscious jokes: Do you find any of these greeting cards funny?

  • Next time you think about trying to communicate with a woman, bang your head against this card till the felling goes away. (Shows a brick wall.)
  • Picking a woman is a lot like buying a car...there should be a lemon law.
  • All women are created equal. All shitheads, but all equal.
  • Curbside Recycling. (Shows woman tied up like a pile of newspapers.)  Women...what a waste!!
  • Why do doctors spank newborn babies?  To knock the dicks off the stupid ones.
  • Some people believe a full moon on Halloween can chance women into totally different creatures. Isn't that ridiculous? I mean, women who really change. Get serious!
  • There are easier things than meeting a good woman. Nailing Jell-o to a tree, for instance.
  • Why did the woman cross the road? Who knows? Why the hell do they do anything?
  • Women are like pantyhose. When you're counting on them the most, they tend to run.
  • Men share a special bond because there are certain things that women can never understand. Life, for example.

Well, all of those are real greeting cards. The only difference is that we reversed the sex of the individuals. Then there are the ones that really can't be changed, like:

  • Bubby's Rules of Dating:  a. Spot your man. b. Take him to the cleaners.
  • Getting rid of him, honey?  Make it a clean break...or at least a compound fracture.
  • Why don't women have brains? 'cause they don't have a penis to keep them in!!!

These cards wouldn't be on the shelves if they didn't sell, and, believe me, they sell. And the joke books women buy that ridicule men, many of which we list in our "Humor?" book section as a reference. Dating back to the 1980s, we have everything from Ma, Can I be a Feminist and Still Like Men? Sure...Just like you can be a vegetarian, and like fried chicken. Lyrics from Life, Nicole Hollander, 1980, and Picking on Men, The first honest collection of quotations about men, Judy Allen, 1986 to the continuation in more recent books like Women Are From Venus, Men Are From Hell, Amanda Newman,1999 and the totally unfunny ManSpeak: What he says...what he really means, Marnie Winston-MaCauley, 1996, just one of many unfunny books published by Andrews and McMeel of Kansas City. I wonder if the people who edit their books have ever seen sunlight? This is just one more way that brings to mind, "If women ran the world, would it be better?"  Not by these examples, atleast.

One of the most telling statements came probably 20 years ago in a Feiffer comics strip showing a woman talking to her boyfriend. "I will never forget the last five days with you, Joey. You're compassionate. You're sensitive. You're sincere. You're thoughtful. You're caring. I needed the break. Thanks. How I'm going back to men."

And television is full of women hitting, kicking, slapping, and punching men out for things they say (sometimes for humor, sometimes very serious. Have you ever watch any of the "America's Funniest Video" type shows. Ever notice that a show doesn't go by without at least one video of a man getting hit, kicked and bitten in the balls. Let me tell you from experience, it isn't funny.

And the jokes abound. One that I passed on and repeated often was this one:  "If a man makes a statement in the wilderness and there isn't a woman around to hear him, is he still wrong."  I originally thought this was funny. Until I realized that I had my invisible "I can take it" armor on so I wouldn't feel it. But, its words started seeping in. "Men are always wrong." "I am always wrong." "Women know the truth." "Women are always right." And on. Of course, none of these statements are true, but they come with years, and in some cases, centuries of baggage about taking "it" like a man, whatever "it" is, so that I can be accepted by women. I wouldn't want to be a complainer, or a whiner or a victim, by any means. However, I no longer pass of that joke because it stands to close of my psyche and I don't find it supportive of an egalitarian relationship with the other sex.

The Internet has become the most recent culprit. It's so easy to forward an insensitive email joke to everyone on your list, and so many do. At the risk of their wrath, I make a habit now of using the little button "Reply to All" to make my comments known to everyone who received the original email about how distasteful it is. While some women have objected to me using their cc list for my thoughts, I've found that it's usually the men who come to the woman's defense charging me with all kinds of things from being uptight to being an SOB and more. I'd prefer not receiving the jokes in the first place and hope that you see how alienating they can be and not forward them to anyone else. However, now they know how I'll react if I get one. If you must, there are nonsexist jokes out there that don't ridicule or shame a group, class, race, or religion in order to be funny.

So, next time you think about hitting the "forward" button on e-mail, or passing on any joke, think about it first and see if you're really adding to the collective conscious or collective unconscious. After all, we're all responsible to make this a better world for us and our children and this is one of the many areas that you need to consider.

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Seems like the right time to read a good book, get some crayons and paper, strum on the guitar that's warping in the garage, buy a drum, make some popcorn and rent a good movie or cook the family a special meal. Take a breather and settle down. Whatever you do, break a pattern and do something new and different. Some books to help: Cooking, Humor, Meditation, Miscellaneous, Poetry. Issues: See our Culture Category. Resources: Drummakers.

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Find humor anywhere and everywhere. Thirteen-year-old boys scan for humor. Learn to recultivate the thirteen-year-old humor seeker in you by noticing funny incidents in your life on a daily basis. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE DAY

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The last straw series by Jeff Kinney

BOOK OF THE WEEK

Reducing Infant Mortality and Improving the Health of Babies. A documentary film supporting maternal/infant health care. The societal economic cost for preterm births is over $26 billion a year: almost $17 billion in medical care services, $6 billion in lost household and labor productivity, another $2 billion in maternal delivery costs, a little over $1 billion in special education care for disabling conditions, and over $600 million in early intervention services. This film is at the forefront of the birth revolution in America! It is a must-see for everyone who cares about birth in America today and particularly expectant parents., DVD, 2009 www.reducinginfantmortality.com, debtaki@yahoo.com (free)

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Your Wise Brain - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Tom Matlack - Tom Matlack - Good Men Project - www.menstuff.org/columns/matlack/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

June is Adopt-A-Shelter Cat; Cancer from the Sun; Children's Awareness; Entrepreneurs "Do It Yourself" Marketing; Fireworks Safety; *Gay & Lesbian Pride Coming Out Month - Time to celebrate all forms of love and family; International Men's; International People Skills; National Bless-a-Child; National Burglary Prevention; National Rivers; National Safety; National Scleroderma Awareness; Rebuild Your Life; Student Safety; Vision Research and National Headache Awareness Month.

Jun 1-30 is International Men's Month - See List of Men's Issues & Book of the Day. Each day at "Today" on our home page, we will be presenting information on a different men's issue. The issue changes each day at midnight, so check in to learn more about "Men's Issues" and men's lives. We will also have a Book of the Day concerning that issue. This might be the perfect time to sign up for our free newsletter which will bring all of this to you each morning. Spread the word and let everyone in your address book know.

May 14-Jun 18: National Family Month. Week of June 1-7: International Volunteers; Stepparents Week. June 2-9: National Homeownership Week. June 2-10: National Fishing Week. June 3-9: Black Single Parents, National Hug Holiday, *Small Business Week. June 7-14: Nurses Assistants Day and Week. June 10-16: *National Flag Week. June 11-17:  Meet a Mate, *National Little League Baseball; National Men's Health Week in the U.S. and Canada. June 13-20: National Hermit Week. June 17-23: National Forgiveness; Universal Father's Week. June 17-24: Amateur Radio Week. June 18-22:  Take Your Pet to Work Week. June 24-30: Carpenter Any Awareness; Helen Keller Deaf-Blindness Awareness Week. June 27 - July 4: Special Recreation Week. June 1: National New Year's Resolution Recommitment; Stand for Children Day that encourages individuals to improve children's lives. www.stand.org. June 1-2 Donut; Partner's Day - Day to give thanks to your spouse/partner for precious love shared. June 2: Mindfulness; National Trails Day; June 3: Children's Awareness, June 4: United Nationals International Day of Innocent Children Victims of Aggression. June 5: Alternative Officing, National Family, United Nations World Environment Day - Day to mourn the harm done to the earth (past and present), make reparation and celebrate its beauty. June 9: Take a Kid Fishing Weekend. June 10: Abused Women and Children's Awareness Day; Alcoholics Anonymous founded. Children's Sunday. June 11:  Race Unity Day. June 14: *Flag Day,  Family History; Sustainable Development Day - Day the world's nations committed to sustainable development (1992). June 15: Magna Carta Day. June 16: *Father's Day, Family Awareness, United Nations World Day to Combat Desertification and Drought, Join Hands Day. June 19: National Splurge; Still Need to Do; World Sauntering Day. June 20:  World Juggling; Toad Hollow Day of Thank You. June 21:  Baby Boomers Recognition Day. June 23: Let It Go Day. June 24: Celebration of the Senses; America's Kids Day. June 26: UN International Day in Support of Victims of Torture; United Nations International Day Against Drug Abuse and Illicit Trafficking; National Columnist's Day. June 27: National HIV Testing; Special Recreation for Disabled, Decide to Be Married Day. June 28: Stonewall Riots - (1969), day to mourn victims of homophobia (past and present), make peace, and celebrate lesbian and gay empowerment. June 29: Peter & Paul Day. June 30: Descendants Day.

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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