Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

APRIL 17

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
Colin Monteath/Adventure Photo & Film
Achieve Your Dreams

April 17 - Independence Day in Kampuchea and Syria. * Bay of Pigs Invasion launched on this day in 1961. More than 1,500 Cuban exiles invaded Cuba in an ill-fated attempt to overthrow Fidel Castro. * The 355-year "state of war" between the Netherlands and the Scilly Isles came to an end on this date in 1986. Though hostilities had ceased three centuries earlier, a standing joke in the islands was that no one had bothered to declare an end to the war. * Cambodia fell when its capital was captured by the Khmer Rouge (1975). The Pol Pot regime inaugurated "Year One" and the wholesale slaughter of intellectuals, political enemies and peasants began. As many as two million Cambodians perished. Vigil for true peace, justice, and respect for the human rights of all in Asia. * After nearly a decade of struggle and suppression the Polish labor union Solidarity was granted legal status, clearing the way for the downfall of the Polish Communist Party. Solidarity and the Polish people surprised the government by winning 99 of the 100 parliamentary seats. * Columbia Neurolab (US) was launched with seven astronauts and scientists and 2,000 animals (crickets, mice, snails, and fish) to study the nervous system in space (1998). * Launch date to lunar probe vehicle, which made soft landing on Moon on Apr 20, 1998 and with its digging apparatus established surface qualities. * Dow Jones Tops 3,000 on this day in 1991. * Birthdays:  Thornton Wilder, William Holden, Norman Julius ("Boomer") Esiason, Cap Anson, John Pierpont Morgan, Harry Reasoner, Sean Bean, Don Kirshner.

DAILY THOUGHTS

Is it even possible to become free from emotional pain in this life?  Or, putting it more mildly, is it possible to spiritually evolve to a level of consciousness at which the pain of living is at least diminished?  The answer is yes and no. The answer is yes, because once suffering is completely accepted, it ceases in a sense to be suffering. It is also yews because the unceasing practice of discipline leads to mastery, and the spiritually evolved person is masterful in the same sense that the adult is masterful in relation to the child. The Road Less Traveled

A little competitiveness in bed keeps things interesting. - Randy, 26 Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

Before children are disciplined, they must know in advance what is a punishable offense and what is the penalty. Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

When Grandparents are Caregivers.  Having your parents take care of your child can be wonderful. But there are special problems, too. What to do?  Be open to their point of view. If you find yourself in disagreement, examine your own attitude and make certain that it's not motivated by defensiveness. If not, find some reading material that supports your judgment or get input from an objective source like your pediatrician. Don't be confrontational. Acknowledge the fact that both of you want to do the right thing. Express your appreciation. Even if your parents make some mistakes, remember that they love your child and are giving him something that only grandparents can. Family Feelings

"We cannot live the afternoon of life according to the program of life's morning; for what was great in the morning will be little at evening, and what in the morning was true will at evening have become a lie." - Psychologist Carl Jung. New Passages

Raccoon Repellents. If you're putting in a garden, timid raccoons can be discouraged by "natural" repellents: old shoes, dog or human hair, cayenne pepper, or mothballs. Live traps work fine, but raccoons have been known to return after having been transported up to 20 miles away. If all else fails, try electric fencing. The Old Farmer's Almanac

Marriage may look like an arrangement of persons, but at a deeper level it is a profound stirring of souls. Like all initiations, it marks a fundamental shift in perceptions of oneself and one's world. Soul Mates

In creating, the only hard thing is to begin. - James Russell Lowell. Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About:  Wearing shorts again. Oversized, fluffy pillows. Peanut-butter kisses. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

You need to trust yourself in order to follow your choice. If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

To make a seesaw work, you have to take turns being down. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

Principles are guidelines for human conduct that are proven to have enduring, permanent value. They're fundamental. They're essentially unarguable because they are self-evident. One way to quickly grasp the self-evident nature of principles is to simply consider the absurdity of attempting to live an effective life based on their opposites. I doubt that anyone would seriously consider unfairness, deceit, baseness, uselessness, mediocrity or degeneration to be a solid foundation for lasting happiness and success. Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

If you have multiple checking accounts, getting rid of all but one of them will greatly simplify your banking chores.  Simplify Your Life

Under stress many people unknowingly clench their teeth and tighten their jaw muscles. To relax the muscles in this area, open the mouth wide and yawn. Not only does this loosen up tense muscles, it also allows your body to take in an extra dose of oxygen. Stress Busters

Split a birthday in half!  Throw a surprise half-birthday party for each of your kids say when they turn 10 1/2. Sing "Happy Birthday," but only halfway through. And don't forget to serve half a cake! To Do Today

The expectations of life depend upon diligence; the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools. - Confucius  Win the Day!

Estar (ehSTAHR) To be. Ya estoy viejo para esto!  I'm too old for this! Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: HABITS

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. - Mark Twain

Well, yes and no. Having a habit doesn't mean it's a negative one. Some of our habits are good ones. But having too many of them usually signifies inflexibility and a need for order that is out of the realm of healthy living.

Of course, Twain is speaking of "other people's habits" like "other people's children" - we have trouble tolerating them. But we really need to look at our own. What do we do each day, each morning, each weekend, that isn't doing anything positive for us? Are our habits hiding behaviors and unfinished business? Strict, by-the-hour, by-the-minute routines and habits allow us to hide.

I'll look "beneath" my habits today and attempt to determine if I'm covering up unfinished, unattended business. Meditations For Men Who Do Too Much

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at mencare@menstuff.org. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Tell your mate they're beautiful. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

Life, Love, Laughter: Celebrating your existence with DVD, Osho. In this collection of reflections, the author's inspiring and loving stories go far beyond the usual chicken-soup fare. This book establishes a new genre of reflective and inspirational text stripped of all platitudes and clichés, one absolutely in tune with the realities of the twenty-first century. In this artful work, he mixes entertainment and inspiration, ancient Zen stories and contemporary jokes to help us find love, laughter, and ultimately, happiness. This book includes an original talk by the author on DVD. This visual component enables the reader to experience the wisdom and humor of the author straight from the source. www.osho.com St. Martin's Griffin, www.stmartins.com 2009 ISBN 978-0-312-53109-6

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Just One Thing - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

April is Alcohol Awareness; Animal Cruelty Prevention; California Earthquake Preparedness; *Cancer Control, Community Spirit; Couple Appreciation; *Child Abuse Prevention; Holy Humor; Home Improvement Safety; International Amateur Radio; International Customer Loyalty; International Daffynitions; International Legacy; International Twit Award; International Work Life Enrichment; Keep American Beautiful; Mathematics Education; Month of the Young Child; National Autism Awareness; National Humor; National Knuckles Down; National Lawn and Garden; National Poetry Month, National Self-Publishing; National Sexually Transmitted Diseases Education and Awareness; National Youth Sports Safety; Occupational Therapy; Prevent Injuries America; School Library Media; Spring Ahead for Life; Stress Awareness (breathe); World Habitat Awareness; Zam! Zoo and Aquarium Month. And, depending on the school system, it's also Spring Break.

Mar 13-Apr 15: Deaf History Month. Mar 25-Apr 4: Muharram. Mar 26-Apr 2: Navaratri/Gangaur. And Apr 1-7 Testicular Cancer Awareness Week - Get a Grip!, Genital Integrity Awareness Week, Washington, D.C.; Golden Rule; Dumb; International Building Safety; National Blue Ribbon; National Library; National Medical Patient Advocacy; National Occupational Therapy; National Pecan; National Pet First Aid Awareness; National Poetry; Passion; Week of the Young Child Week. Apr 2-6: Strolf-Stretch Week. Apr 2-8: National Public Health Week. Apr 4-10: Hate Week. Apr 6-8: Alcohol-Free Weekend. Apr 8-14: National Garden; National Week of the Ocean; Network Marketing Professionals; *Pan American; Holy Week. Apr 12-18: National Minority Cancer Awareness Week. Apr 15-21: Grange; National Infant Immunization; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; Reading is Fun Week. Apr 16-20: Consumer Awareness; Egg Salad; Explore Your Career Options; Family Laughing Through Stories; *National Crime Victims Rights; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; National Organize Your Files; Young People's Poetry Week. Apr 17-23: National Park Week. Apr 21-22: Just Pray No: Worldwide Weekend Prayer. Apr 21-23: Earth Day Weekend. Apr 21-May 2: Festival of Ridvan. Apr 22-28: Administration Professionals; National Karaoke; *National Volunteer; Sky Awareness Week. Apr 22-29: *Jewish Heritage Week. Apr 23-29: Astronomy; National Playground Safety; National TV  Turnoff; National YMCA Week. Apr 29-May 5: *National Science and Technology Week.

Apr 1: April Fools'; Check Your Batteries; Lupus Alert; National Repot Your Plant; Sorry Charlie Day; Testicular Cancer - What is it?, Apr 2: International Children's Book; Reconciliation Day, Testicular Cancer - Symptoms. Apr 3 - Testicular Cancer - What the doctors look for . Apr 4: Thank You, School Librarian; Victims of Violence Holy; Testicular Cancer - Prevention, Apr 5 - National Alcohol Screening; *National Equal Pay; National Fun at Work; National Tomb-Sweeping (Taiwan); Tartan Day; Testicular Cancer - Treatment, Apr 6 - Testicular Cancer - Prognosis, Apr 7 -National Hug Your Newsman; UN World Health Day. Testicular Cancer - Automatic monthly reminder, self-exam and other resources. Apr 8: International Feng Shui Awareness Day. Apr 9: *National Former Prisoner of War Recognition; Winston Churchill Day. Apr 10: National Siblings; Salvation Army Founder's Day. Apr 11:  Barbershop Quarter Day. Apr 12: Vote Lawyers Out of Office Day. Apr 13: Blame Someone Else; National D.A.R.E. Day, Apr 14: International Moment of Laughter; *Pan American; Remembrance Day. Apr 15: National Coin Day. Apr 17: Blah Blah Blah; National Stress Awareness; National Positive Alternatives for Living; Verrazanoo Day. Apr 18: Pet Owners Independence; Third World Day. Apr 19: John Parker Day. Apr 20: Holocaust; National Youth Service Day. Apr 21: Earth Environmental Angels; Kindergarten; San Jacinto Day. Apr 22: Earth Day Anniversary; Girl Scout Leader Day. Apr 25: Administrative Professionals, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day. Apr 26: Day of Silence; Hug an Australian: National Playground Safety; Richter Scale; Take Our Daughters to Work Day. Apr 27: Hug a Prom Sponsor; National Arbor National Child Care Professionals; National Hairball Awareness Day, Apr 28: Astronomy; Kiss Your Mate; National Sense of Smell; Native American Heritage Day. Apr 29: Mother, Father Deaf; National Puppetry Day. Apr 30: International Dare of Live; International Walk; National Honesty; Spank Out Day USA.

In all of this, don't let Child Abuse Prevention get lost. Check out our extensive sections of issues: Abuse, Circumcision, Gangs, Hazing, Incest/Molestation, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Harassment, Suicide, TV violence, Violence, Domestic Violence, Women's Violence and Prisons. and Books - Abuse of Boys, Child Abuse, Abuse - MPD, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Circumcision, Anger, Forgiveness, Violence, Domestic Violence, Sexual Violence, Sexual Harassment, and Women's Violence.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

National Missing Children's Day
Help find a missing child!
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24-Hour Hotline

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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