Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

APRIL 8

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
John Warden/Tony Stone Images
Achieve Your Dreams

April 8 - Henry Aaron broke Babe Ruth's home-run record on this day in 1974. * On this date President Harry S. Truman seized control of the nation's steel mills by presidential order in an attempt to prevent a shutdown by strikers (1952). The move was determined unconstitutional and workers immediately walked out. Production dropped from 300,000 tons a day to less than 20,000. After 53 days the strike ended with steelworkers receiving a 16 cents and hour plus a 5.4 cent hourly increase in fringe benefits. Editor: It signaled the beginning of the end of steel production in the US. * The "Poll-tax" was outlawed in 1966. * 10th Anniversary of Ryan White's death. He put the face of a child on AIDS and helped promote greater understanding of the disease. He contracted it from a blood transfusion and was banned from public schools in Central Indiana and moved to Cicero, IN where he was accepted by students and faculty alike. * Birthdays: Buddha, O. Raymond Knight, Gerald McRaney, Kofi Annan, U.N. Secretary General, Shecky Greene, Gary Edmund Carter, William D. Chase, John J. Havlicek, Seymour Hersh, Julian Lennon, Stuart Pankin, Terry Porter, John Schneider, Taran Noah Smith, William Wordsworth (1770), poet and mystic who found connection with Deity while communing with Nature. William Ellery Channing (1810), Unitarian who believed all concepts of Deity to be aspects of the one Deity, and preached religious tolerance.

Change your toothbrush every three months.

DAILY THOUGHTS

It is in the giving up of self that human beings can find the most ecstatic and lasting, solid, durable joy of life. And it is death that provides life with all its meaning. This "secret" is the central wisdom of religion. The Road Less Traveled

Sometimes the demands of the soul are paradoxical, so it may ask for something that on the surface may look contrary to a "good" marriage," but soulful marriages are often odd on the surface. Soul Mates

My best memory was at a Packers game. We had a blanket across our laps and she gave me an awesome hand job. The Packers won, too. - Tony, 28 Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

It's never too early to involve your child in the truth about family finances. Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

3 to 4 Years - Musical Brain Booster. Musical ability is often regarded as a sign of intelligence. In fact, making music lessons at an early age - when connections in the brain are rapidly forming - may actually enhance spatial mental skills. Spatial reasoning skills are important for learning math and science, for example. Though children in the study benefited from formal music instruction, the researchers believe that family sing-a longs and using a keyboard at home could also help your preschooler's intellectual development. Family Feelings

Bisexual choreographer and playwright Michael Bennett was born on this day in 1943. His Tony Award - winning a play A Chorus Line was the longest-running show in Broadway history, lasting almost fifteen years. Gay & Lesbian Calendar

Dr. Richard Marrs, a Santa Monica, CA fertility specialist, has identified three different times in reproductive life in which there is a significant change:  "From about twenty-five to thirty-seven, a woman's ability to get pregnant is the same. Then she hits the thirty-seventh, thirty-eighth year, and it drops dramatically. Then it flattens out again until forty - another break point. Somewhere between forty-two and forty-three there's another significant decline, and from then on it stays pretty flat." New Passages

What the Greeks Tell Us:  Men prone to tears are good. Act quickly, think slowly. Welcome is the best cheer. A miser is ever in want. Add not fire to fire. The Old Farmer's Almanac

Achievements are works in progress. Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About: Good triumphing over all. Wonderfully intense feelings. Windsocks waving. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

If you can't find a way through the crowd, make one. Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. - Thomas Edison  If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

Embrace time alone. Solitude gives you the opportunity to confront your inner self in ways that few other endeavors can. Out of your time of solitude come serenity, peace of mind, and unparalleled opportunities to connect with your soul. Simplify Your Life

Any time you feel very relaxed, back in all your senses and think of one word to capture he experience for you. Then in a stressful situation, say that word to yourself and let the relaxation you're stored in memory be reactivated. Stress Busters

I attribute my success to this:  I never gave or took an excuse. - Florence Nightingale Win the Day!

Marron (mahRROHN) Brown. Me pillo de marron. It took me by surprise. (Lit. I was caught in brown.) Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: CHILD ABUSE AND NEGLECT - ANOTHER PERSPECTIVE

Men have long been the ones to get the press from alleged child abuse charges so that they have literally been forced out of elimentary schools and other child related jobs However, unless you are in the Child Abuse movement, I would bet that you didn't know that almost two-thirds of the perpetrators of child maltreatment are women and that 68% of these women are younger than 30. This is not to hide the fact that there are a substantial number of male perpetrators and that men represent 77% of the perpetrators of sexual abuse. However, parents are the perpetrators in 50% of all cases with mothers as the perpetrator in over 27% of cases, fathers in over 35% of cases, only an 8% difference. It does bring out a curious situation that women, and particularly young women, are the primary perpetrators and no one seems to let that fact be known.

I wonder how many men whose partner abuses the children, are afraid to report the situation because they (1) Assume that women are the primary nurturers of children and that men are the primary abusers so the neglect, psychological, and physical abuse of the children must not be that bad, or (2) If he reports it, the finger might be pointed at him (which happens in many such cases).

What these men should know is that women, not men, are the primary abusers of children and that if you don't report her actions and someone else does, you are likely to serve more time than she does. After all, it is the man in this culture who has been assigned the role of protector. And, while it is scary and sometimes dangerous to report a woman, it is more devastating to the children, and possibly to you, not to report her.

Information can be given through a therapist, health care professional, lawyer, or educational personnel (most of whom are required by law in most states to report this information to Child Protective Services) or directly with the police. For your own safety, so there is less likelihood of you being accused as the perpetrator (assuming you are not a perpetrator), a lawyer or therapist might be the best route. MORE

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Recognize that there's a lot in life we cannot fix. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

So Sexy So Soon: The new sexualized childhood and what parents can do to protect their kids, Levin, Diane E. Levin and Jean Kilbourne, Risqué Halloween costumes for young girls. T-shirts that boast "Chick Magnet" for toddler boys. Sexy content on almost every television channel, as well as in movies and video games. Popular culture and technology inundate our boys and girls with an onslaught of graphic sexual messages at earlier ages than ever before. Without the emotional sophistication to understand what they are doing and seeing, kids are getting into increasing trouble emotionally and socially. Parents are left shaking their heads, wondering: How did this happen? What can we do? The authors, internationally recognized experts in childhood development and the impact of the media on children and teens, offer parent essential, age-appropriate strategies to country the assault. Filled with savvy suggestions, helpful sample dialogues, and poignant stories from families dealing with these issues, this book provides parents with the information, skills, and confidence they need to discuss sensitive topics openly and effectively - so their kids can just be kids. www.sosexysosoon.com Ballantine Books, www.ballantinebooks.com, 2009, ISBN 978-0-345-50507-1

 

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Just One Thing - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

April is Alcohol Awareness; Animal Cruelty Prevention; California Earthquake Preparedness; *Cancer Control, Community Spirit; Couple Appreciation; *Child Abuse Prevention; Holy Humor; Home Improvement Safety; International Amateur Radio; International Customer Loyalty; International Daffynitions; International Legacy; International Twit Award; International Work Life Enrichment; Keep American Beautiful; Mathematics Education; Month of the Young Child; National Autism Awareness; National Humor; National Knuckles Down; National Lawn and Garden; National Poetry Month, National Self-Publishing; National Sexually Transmitted Diseases Education and Awareness; National Youth Sports Safety; Occupational Therapy; Prevent Injuries America; School Library Media; Spring Ahead for Life; Stress Awareness (breathe); World Habitat Awareness; Zam! Zoo and Aquarium Month. And, depending on the school system, it's also Spring Break.

Mar 13-Apr 15: Deaf History Month. Mar 25-Apr 4: Muharram. Mar 26-Apr 2: Navaratri/Gangaur. And Apr 1-7 Testicular Cancer Awareness Week - Get a Grip!, Genital Integrity Awareness Week, Washington, D.C.; Golden Rule; Dumb; International Building Safety; National Blue Ribbon; National Library; National Medical Patient Advocacy; National Occupational Therapy; National Pecan; National Pet First Aid Awareness; National Poetry; Passion; Week of the Young Child Week. Apr 2-6: Strolf-Stretch Week. Apr 2-8: National Public Health Week. Apr 4-10: Hate Week. Apr 6-8: Alcohol-Free Weekend. Apr 8-14: National Garden; National Week of the Ocean; Network Marketing Professionals; *Pan American; Holy Week. Apr 12-18: National Minority Cancer Awareness Week. Apr 15-21: Grange; National Infant Immunization; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; Reading is Fun Week. Apr 16-20: Consumer Awareness; Egg Salad; Explore Your Career Options; Family Laughing Through Stories; *National Crime Victims Rights; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; National Organize Your Files; Young People's Poetry Week. Apr 17-23: National Park Week. Apr 21-22: Just Pray No: Worldwide Weekend Prayer. Apr 21-23: Earth Day Weekend. Apr 21-May 2: Festival of Ridvan. Apr 22-28: Administration Professionals; National Karaoke; *National Volunteer; Sky Awareness Week. Apr 22-29: *Jewish Heritage Week. Apr 23-29: Astronomy; National Playground Safety; National TV  Turnoff; National YMCA Week. Apr 29-May 5: *National Science and Technology Week.

Apr 1: April Fools'; Check Your Batteries; Lupus Alert; National Repot Your Plant; Sorry Charlie Day; Testicular Cancer - What is it?, Apr 2: International Children's Book; Reconciliation Day, Testicular Cancer - Symptoms. Apr 3 - Testicular Cancer - What the doctors look for . Apr 4: Thank You, School Librarian; Victims of Violence Holy; Testicular Cancer - Prevention, Apr 5 - National Alcohol Screening; *National Equal Pay; National Fun at Work; National Tomb-Sweeping (Taiwan); Tartan Day; Testicular Cancer - Treatment, Apr 6 - Testicular Cancer - Prognosis, Apr 7 -National Hug Your Newsman; UN World Health Day. Testicular Cancer - Automatic monthly reminder, self-exam and other resources. Apr 8: International Feng Shui Awareness Day. Apr 9: *National Former Prisoner of War Recognition; Winston Churchill Day. Apr 10: National Siblings; Salvation Army Founder's Day. Apr 11:  Barbershop Quarter Day. Apr 12: Vote Lawyers Out of Office Day. Apr 13: Blame Someone Else; National D.A.R.E. Day, Apr 14: International Moment of Laughter; *Pan American; Remembrance Day. Apr 15: National Coin Day. Apr 17: Blah Blah Blah; National Stress Awareness; National Positive Alternatives for Living; Verrazanoo Day. Apr 18: Pet Owners Independence; Third World Day. Apr 19: John Parker Day. Apr 20: Holocaust; National Youth Service Day. Apr 21: Earth Environmental Angels; Kindergarten; San Jacinto Day. Apr 22: Earth Day Anniversary; Girl Scout Leader Day. Apr 25: Administrative Professionals, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day. Apr 26: Day of Silence; Hug an Australian: National Playground Safety; Richter Scale; Take Our Daughters to Work Day. Apr 27: Hug a Prom Sponsor; National Arbor National Child Care Professionals; National Hairball Awareness Day, Apr 28: Astronomy; Kiss Your Mate; National Sense of Smell; Native American Heritage Day. Apr 29: Mother, Father Deaf; National Puppetry Day. Apr 30: International Dare of Live; International Walk; National Honesty; Spank Out Day USA.

In all of this, don't let Child Abuse Prevention get lost. Check out our extensive sections of issues: Abuse, Circumcision, Gangs, Hazing, Incest/Molestation, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Harassment, Suicide, TV violence, Violence, Domestic Violence, Women's Violence and Prisons. and Books - Abuse of Boys, Child Abuse, Abuse - MPD, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Circumcision, Anger, Forgiveness, Violence, Domestic Violence, Sexual Violence, Sexual Harassment, and Women's Violence.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

National Missing Children's Day
Help find a missing child!
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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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