Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

APRIL 28

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
Colin Monteath/Adventure Photo & Film
Achieve Your Dreams

April 28 - Kiss Your Mate Day. Show them how much you care. * Canada National Day of Mourning - for workers of the past killed or injured on the job and the 1,000,000 that will be killed or injured this year on the job - mostly men. * Northwestern University announced that the so-called biological clock, that gene governing the daily cycle of waking and sleeping called the circadian rhythm, had been found in mice. (1994) * Italian partisans shot Benito Mussolini near the lakeside village of Dongo. The 23-year-long Fascist rule of Italy was ended. * The most famous of all naval mutinies occurred on board HMS Bounty. Fletcher Christian, leader of the mutiny, put all of the remaining crew (except 8 men and himself) ashore at Tahiti where he picked up 18 Tahitians (6 men and 12 women) and set sail landing at Piticairn Island in 1790. They burned the Bounty and remained undiscovered for 18 years. Only one member of the mutinous crew survived but the little colony had thrived and, when counted by the British in 1856, numbered 194 persons. * A 23-year-long Fascist rule of Italy ended today in 1945 when Italian partisans shot Benito Mussolini near the lakeside village of Dongo. * Mutiny on the Bounty happened on this day in 1789. * Birthdays: Lionel Barrymore, James Monroe, Saddam Hussein, Jay Leno, Mifflin Wister Gibbs, John Daly, Bruno Kirby, Barry Louis Larkin, Harper Lee (Nelle Harper), Chris Young.

DAILY THOUGHTS

Love is too large, too deep ever to be truly understood or measured or limited within the framework of words. The Road Less Traveled

In marriage we need to find ways to keep the soul in mind. The details of daily life can so take over that we neglect the mysterious genius that holds it all together. Soul Mates

Foreplay shouldn't only be about getting the woman ready for sex. - Edward, 26 Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

You've heard the old saying:  Children should be seen and not heard. But if you do your parenting job right, children can be seen, heard and the envy of other parents. Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

Don't Waste Excess Veggies. When we grew more tomatoes than we could eat, we helped our 4-year-old daughter set up a vegetable stand in the front yard. It was a huge success, selling out in about a half an hour. She loves having extra spending money, and is already looking forward to next year's crop. And she's become a good helper in the garden! Family Feelings

The 1978 airing of Sgt. Matlovich v. the Air Force on NBC marked the first nonfiction gay rights story to appear on network television. The show told the story of Leonard Matlovich's historic lawsuit against the U.S. military's antigay policies. Gay & Lesbian Calendar

Once we stop being ruled by the need to prove ourselves to the world and begin to relax our vigilance around maintaining the false self of young adulthood, we can start stripping back down to what is real, not false or copied, to uncover our own authenticity. New Passages

May you live all the days of your life. - Jonathan Swift Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About:  The scrubbing clouds of spring. Children with manners. Wind-up musical toys. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

Toads aren't ugly, they're just toads.  Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

The journey toward wholeness can be expedited if you are willing to use your outer experiences as tools to heal your own inner wounds. Every negative experience is a chance to heal something within you.  If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

The degree to which we have developed our independent will in our everyday lives is measured by our personal integrity. Integrity is, fundamentally, the value we place on ourselves. It's our ability to make and keep commitments to ourselves, to "walk our talk,". It's honor with self, a fundamental part of the Character Ethic, and the essence of proactive growth.  Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

If you want your carpets to look good without having to spend a lot of time on them, one of the new speckled or patterned or multicolored carpets will hide a multitude of sins and make your life a whole lot easier.  Simplify Your Life

When you get stuck on a problem at home or at work, take a walk and allow your subconscious to drift and work on it for you. By the time you get back to the problem, you may find that a solution has "suddenly" occurred to you. Stress Busters

Scoop up a think drink!  Put vanilla ice cream into a tall glass. Pour in orange juice, Sunny Delight or Five-Alice. Yum! To Do Today

It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. In this life we get nothing save by effort. - Theodore Roosevelt. Win the Day!

La cuchara (kooCHAHrah) spoon. Siempre lo tuve que meter con cuchara. You always had to spoon feed the information to him. Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: SHIELD OF WORDS

Words, as is well known, are great foes of reality. - Joseph Campbell

Sometimes, particularly when I'm scared, I tend to talk too much. I hide behind a shield of words. I used to talk and talk to drive my fear away, but more often I ended up driving out someone I loved. The fear did disappear for a while, but I found it years later: in my lower back, in my butt, my shoulders, my jaw, and in my heart. Now I'm committed to feeling that fear but then letting it pass through me.

I still appreciate words, especially the way they shorten the distance between us. Words help me share my joys and disappointments, my tenderness and encouragement. Still, I can't always be sure that my meaning is coming through to others, even when we speak the same language. But ah! Hugs, kisses, a gentle touch to the cheek, holding a child's face tenderly in the hands, and feeling the love that flows out through the eyes - these communicate what can never be said with words.

Today I will speak less and mean more. A Quiet Strength: Meditations on the Masculine Soul

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. Eat without reading. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

Why Boys Fail: Saving our sons from an educational system that's leaving them behind by Richard Whitmire. Parents and educators have seen it for years: elementary schools swarming with fidgety boys who hold their pencils funny. But what they don't see is that in recent years, the lackluster performances of boys often fails to improve with maturity. Boys are in trouble. However you slice the numbers - fifth-graders in special ed, ninth-graders in held back, low senior grade point averages, high school dropouts, fewer college graduates - boys are performing far below girls. And they're performing far below the expectations of today's market-place, where more and more jobs require college degrees. This book is a sweeping survey of one of the most misunderstood and sometimes totally ignored problems of our day - the precipitous slide in boys' academic achievement, which cuts across racial and economic divides and affects boys around the English-speaking world. The author draws on extensive journalistic skill and experience to pick apart the prevailing theories of what is causing boys to fail - feminized classrooms, toxic boy cultures, mind-numbing video games - and shows how each contributes to the problem but fails to wholly explain it. Instead, the author reverses course from the usual finger-pointing to uncover what is actually working in schools to bring boys up to speed, and draws his conclusions from there. The answer is simple yet monumental: the world has become increasingly verbal, but boys have not. From heightened kindergarten reading expectations to lauguage-dense math problems, many boys lack the reading and writing skills needed to keep pace. Their lagging literacy skills snowball through the schools years and ultimately derail ambitions and prospects. This book is not simply a depressing assessment of the fate of our nation's boys; it also offers suggestions for what works. Packed with inspiring case studies of schools that have successfully implemented programs for improving literacy - such as intensive phonics instruction and ongoing reading instruction in the middle years - this extensively researched, persuasive book is a must-read for parents and educators alike. It opens your eyes to the magnitude of boys' academic underachievement and uncovers effective solutions to countering this deeply troubling and widely misunderstood problem. Amacom, www.amacombooks.org, 2010 ISBN 0-8144-1534-2

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Just One Thing - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Tom Matlack - Tom Matlack - Good Men Project - www.menstuff.org/columns/matlack/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

April is Alcohol Awareness; Animal Cruelty Prevention; California Earthquake Preparedness; *Cancer Control, Community Spirit; Couple Appreciation; *Child Abuse Prevention; Holy Humor; Home Improvement Safety; International Amateur Radio; International Customer Loyalty; International Daffynitions; International Legacy; International Twit Award; International Work Life Enrichment; Keep American Beautiful; Mathematics Education; Month of the Young Child; National Autism Awareness; National Humor; National Knuckles Down; National Lawn and Garden; National Poetry Month, National Self-Publishing; National Sexually Transmitted Diseases Education and Awareness; National Youth Sports Safety; Occupational Therapy; Prevent Injuries America; School Library Media; Spring Ahead for Life; Stress Awareness (breathe); World Habitat Awareness; Zam! Zoo and Aquarium Month. And, depending on the school system, it's also Spring Break.

Mar 13-Apr 15: Deaf History Month. Mar 25-Apr 4: Muharram. Mar 26-Apr 2: Navaratri/Gangaur. And Apr 1-7 Testicular Cancer Awareness Week - Get a Grip!, Genital Integrity Awareness Week, Washington, D.C.; Golden Rule; Dumb; International Building Safety; National Blue Ribbon; National Library; National Medical Patient Advocacy; National Occupational Therapy; National Pecan; National Pet First Aid Awareness; National Poetry; Passion; Week of the Young Child Week. Apr 2-6: Strolf-Stretch Week. Apr 2-8: National Public Health Week. Apr 4-10: Hate Week. Apr 6-8: Alcohol-Free Weekend. Apr 8-14: National Garden; National Week of the Ocean; Network Marketing Professionals; *Pan American; Holy Week. Apr 12-18: National Minority Cancer Awareness Week. Apr 15-21: Grange; National Infant Immunization; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; Reading is Fun Week. Apr 16-20: Consumer Awareness; Egg Salad; Explore Your Career Options; Family Laughing Through Stories; *National Crime Victims Rights; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; National Organize Your Files; Young People's Poetry Week. Apr 17-23: National Park Week. Apr 21-22: Just Pray No: Worldwide Weekend Prayer. Apr 21-23: Earth Day Weekend. Apr 21-May 2: Festival of Ridvan. Apr 22-28: Administration Professionals; National Karaoke; *National Volunteer; Sky Awareness Week. Apr 22-29: *Jewish Heritage Week. Apr 23-29: Astronomy; National Playground Safety; National TV  Turnoff; National YMCA Week. Apr 29-May 5: *National Science and Technology Week.

Apr 1: April Fools'; Check Your Batteries; Lupus Alert; National Repot Your Plant; Sorry Charlie Day; Testicular Cancer - What is it?, Apr 2: International Children's Book; Reconciliation Day, Testicular Cancer - Symptoms. Apr 3 - Testicular Cancer - What the doctors look for . Apr 4: Thank You, School Librarian; Victims of Violence Holy; Testicular Cancer - Prevention, Apr 5 - National Alcohol Screening; *National Equal Pay; National Fun at Work; National Tomb-Sweeping (Taiwan); Tartan Day; Testicular Cancer - Treatment, Apr 6 - Testicular Cancer - Prognosis, Apr 7 -National Hug Your Newsman; UN World Health Day. Testicular Cancer - Automatic monthly reminder, self-exam and other resources. Apr 8: International Feng Shui Awareness Day. Apr 9: *National Former Prisoner of War Recognition; Winston Churchill Day. Apr 10: National Siblings; Salvation Army Founder's Day. Apr 11:  Barbershop Quarter Day. Apr 12: Vote Lawyers Out of Office Day. Apr 13: Blame Someone Else; National D.A.R.E. Day, Apr 14: International Moment of Laughter; *Pan American; Remembrance Day. Apr 15: National Coin Day. Apr 17: Blah Blah Blah; National Stress Awareness; National Positive Alternatives for Living; Verrazanoo Day. Apr 18: Pet Owners Independence; Third World Day. Apr 19: John Parker Day. Apr 20: Holocaust; National Youth Service Day. Apr 21: Earth Environmental Angels; Kindergarten; San Jacinto Day. Apr 22: Earth Day Anniversary; Girl Scout Leader Day. Apr 25: Administrative Professionals, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day. Apr 26: Day of Silence; Hug an Australian: National Playground Safety; Richter Scale; Take Our Daughters to Work Day. Apr 27: Hug a Prom Sponsor; National Arbor National Child Care Professionals; National Hairball Awareness Day, Apr 28: Astronomy; Kiss Your Mate; National Sense of Smell; Native American Heritage Day. Apr 29: Mother, Father Deaf; National Puppetry Day. Apr 30: International Dare of Live; International Walk; National Honesty; Spank Out Day USA.

In all of this, don't let Child Abuse Prevention get lost. Check out our extensive sections of issues: Abuse, Circumcision, Gangs, Hazing, Incest/Molestation, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Harassment, Suicide, TV violence, Violence, Domestic Violence, Women's Violence and Prisons. and Books - Abuse of Boys, Child Abuse, Abuse - MPD, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Circumcision, Anger, Forgiveness, Violence, Domestic Violence, Sexual Violence, Sexual Harassment, and Women's Violence.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

National Missing Children's Day
Help find a missing child!
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24-Hour Hotline

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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