Daily Thoughts & Issues

IN THIS ISSUE:

APRIL 30

Days left until the next millennium 01.01.3001

Photo of the Week
Eric Perlman/Adventure Photo & Film
Achieve Your Dreams

April 30 - Apr 30 eve to May 6 eve: Beltaine/Mid-Spring/May Day/Walpurgis. Beltaine-Old Celtic feast of Blathnat.Blodeuwedd (Goddess of Flowers) and Lugh/Llew (the Oak King-God of the waxing Sun). * Independence Day in the Netherlands. * Wesak * National Childcare Professionals Day. * International Walk Day - to get primal, leave the car at home and whenever possible walk to your destination. * Mother/Father Deaf Day - a day to honor deaf parents and recognize the gifts of culture and language they give to their hearing children. * Muhammad Ali Stripped of Title (1967) when he refused to be inducted into military service. Convicted but reversed by the Supreme Court in 1971. * Speak Out Day USA - a day that asked parents, teachers and daycare workers not to use corporal punishment as discipline and to become aquatinted with positive, effective disciplinary alternatives. nblock@infinet.com or www.stophitting.com. * Organization of American States founded 1948. * South Vietnam falls to Vietcong (1975). The president of South Vietnam announced the country's unconditional surrender to the Vietcong. Communist troops moved into Saigon. The last American troops had left South Vietnam in March, 1973. * On the banks of the Rio Grande, near present day El Paso, the first North American theatrical performance was acted (1598). * Birthdays: Gary Collins, Willie Nelson, Isiah Thomas, William Lilly, Michael J. Smith, Ellis Wilson, Gary Collins, Johnny Galecki, Perry King, Burt Young.

DAILY THOUGHTS

The search for meaning in whatever we do becomes the universal preoccupation of Second Adulthood. It is based on a spiritual imperative: the wish to integrate the disparate aspects of ourselves, the hunger for wholeness, the need to know the truth. The secret in the search for meaning is to find your passion and pursue it. New Passages

Ask the Old Farmer:  Is there really such a thing as spring fever?  Answer:  You betcha! True spring fever occurs when a cool spell is followed by sudden warmth and our bodies are slow to catch up, causing a feeling of lassitude. Get out the spring tonic!  The Old Farmer's Almanac

Get a chocolate-covered cherry, bit the bottom off, drip the juice over me, then lick it. Now, take the shell and pit it on your penis. - Anne, 31 Best of 1001 Sex Secrets Every Man & Woman Should Know

Ask your child, "How big is a quarter?"  Children who have little money will say that it's larger than it really is, and children who come from wealthy families will say the quarter is much smaller than it really is. Use this test to see if your child has an accurate perception of the value of money. Dr. Buff's 365 Day Parenting Calendar

It is actually impossible to forsake our own spiritual development in favor of someone else's. We cannot forsake self-discipline and at the same time be disciplined in our care for another. We cannot be a source of strength unless we nurture our own strength. The Road Less Traveled

We can be alert to the diamond in ourselves and in our partner. It may show itself in such simple things as preoccupation, a sense of being driven, or a tinge of irrationality. Soul Mates

I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul. - William Ernest Henley. Achieve Your Dreams

Things to Be Happy About:  Greek salad and baklava. Framed family photos. Misty Sundays. 14,000 Things to Be Happy About

Don't dive deeper than you have breath for.  Really Important Stuff My Kids Have Taught Me

Rather than focusing on things and time, focus on preserving and enhancing relationships and on accomplishing results. Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

If you find yourself dwelling on your troubles, try a new activity. This can divert your attention from your problems, and as an added benefit, you may make new friends. Stress Busters

Sign a Message. Ask a librarian to help you find a book on American Sign Language. Now read up on it and practice. Demonstrate it for your friends. Learn along with your kids. To Do Today

 Winning is not a sometime thing; it's an all-time thing. You don't win once in a while, you don't do things right once in a while, you do them all the time. Winning is a habit. - Vince Lombardi. Win the Day!

Carnal (karNAHL) of the flesh. Es mi primo carnal. He's my first cousin. (Lit. He's my cousin of the flesh.) Living Language

TODAY'S ISSUE: CARE

When you take care of something, it lives a long time. - Zen master Dainin Katagiri

Care can be done in many ways, and there are many people and things warranting our care. Some ways of caring are vigorous and direct, others are more subtle and indirect. Some people are really good at caring by gift-giving, others by providing nurturing environments.

Masculinity is something that needs caring, like an orchid. It is too often taken for granted. When ignored, it is endangered. When cared for, it can thrive. Men are more fragile than we sometimes admit. Some of us men have difficulty surrendering ourselves to care. This can literally be dangerous - for example when we are sick and need the care of another, either a friend or a professional. When men care for each other, the results can be wonderful.

How do you want to be cared for? Go ahead and admit that at times you do want to be cared for. This does not mean that you are weak and dependent. It means you are more fully a man. A Quiet Strength: Meditations on the Masculine Soul

Hey Man: Did you make a difference yesterday? Let us know at Contact Us. See beauty where others may have missed it. Dew on a spider web...a child;'s smile...look around you. What Every Man Needs to Know Want to make a difference but you don't know where to start?

BOOK OF THE WEEK

Why Boys Fail: Saving our sons from an educational system that's leaving them behind by Richard Whitmire. Parents and educators have seen it for years: elementary schools swarming with fidgety boys who hold their pencils funny. But what they don't see is that in recent years, the lackluster performances of boys often fails to improve with maturity. Boys are in trouble. However you slice the numbers - fifth-graders in special ed, ninth-graders in held back, low senior grade point averages, high school dropouts, fewer college graduates - boys are performing far below girls. And they're performing far below the expectations of today's market-place, where more and more jobs require college degrees. This book is a sweeping survey of one of the most misunderstood and sometimes totally ignored problems of our day - the precipitous slide in boys' academic achievement, which cuts across racial and economic divides and affects boys around the English-speaking world. The author draws on extensive journalistic skill and experience to pick apart the prevailing theories of what is causing boys to fail - feminized classrooms, toxic boy cultures, mind-numbing video games - and shows how each contributes to the problem but fails to wholly explain it. Instead, the author reverses course from the usual finger-pointing to uncover what is actually working in schools to bring boys up to speed, and draws his conclusions from there. The answer is simple yet monumental: the world has become increasingly verbal, but boys have not. From heightened kindergarten reading expectations to lauguage-dense math problems, many boys lack the reading and writing skills needed to keep pace. Their lagging literacy skills snowball through the schools years and ultimately derail ambitions and prospects. This book is not simply a depressing assessment of the fate of our nation's boys; it also offers suggestions for what works. Packed with inspiring case studies of schools that have successfully implemented programs for improving literacy - such as intensive phonics instruction and ongoing reading instruction in the middle years - this extensively researched, persuasive book is a must-read for parents and educators alike. It opens your eyes to the magnitude of boys' academic underachievement and uncovers effective solutions to countering this deeply troubling and widely misunderstood problem. Amacom, www.amacombooks.org, 2010 ISBN 0-8144-1534-2

SPECIAL URLs

 

MENSTUFF COLUMNS BY AUTHOR

  • The Advice Diva - The Advice Diva - relationship and sexuality issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/advicediva/archive.html
  • Peter Alsop - Song of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/alsop/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - A Man Overboard - Interview of the Month - www.menstuff.org/columns/overboard/archive.html
  • Reid Baer - Poetry - poetry read on YouTube - www.menstuff.org/columns/baer/archive.html
  • Molly Barrow - Shrink About This - www.menstuff.org/columns/barrow/archive.html
  • Peter Baylies - At Home Dads - on at-home-dad issues that impact fathers who stay at home to raise their kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/baylies/archive.html
  • Tom Blake - Middle-Age Relationships - from an expert on dating after 50. www.menstuff.org/columns/blake/archive.html
  • Mark Brandenburg - Great Fathers - on fathering issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/greatfathers/archive.html
  • Ted Braude - BoysWork - a columnist in the The Detroit Free Press "Body and Mind" section www.menstuff.org/columns/braude/archive.html
  • Armin Brott - A Father's Guide - hosts "Positive Parenting" on radio www.menstuff.org/columns/brott/archive.html
  • Dan Bulf - Get Real - weekly pod cast on men's issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/bulf/archive.html
  • Ken Byers - Transition - on men's life transitions - www.menstuff.org/columns/byers/archive.html
  • Sandra L. Caron - Sex Talk - college students get answers to their questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/sextalk/archive.html
  • Neil Chethik - Relationships - www.menstuff.org/columns/chethik/archive.html
  • Otto & Susie Collins - Susie and Otto - relationship issues discussed - www.menstuff.org/columns/susie&otto/archive.html
  • David Copeland - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Forrest Craver - Spirituality & Social Change - www.menstuff.org/columns/craver/archive.html
  • Layne & Paul Cutright - Powerful Partnerships - relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/cutright/archive.html
  • Ron DesMarais - Cavemen in the Kitchen - great recipes for men - www.menstuff.org/columns/desmarais/archive.html
  • Jed Diamond - Irritable Male Syndrome - www.menstuff.org/columns/diamond/archive.html
  • Doc Love - Women Don't Lie, Man Don't Listen - answers to relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/doclov/archive.html
  • Barry Durdant-Hollamby - Creating Change - creating change in your life - www.menstuff.org/columns/durdant/archive.html
  • Irv Engel - The Real Deal - www.menstuff.org/columns/engel/archive.html
  • Nancy Fagan - Expert Dating Advice - with Nancy Fagan - www.menstuf.org/columns/fagan/archive.html
  • Warren Farrell - Men's Issues: Facts and Perspectives www.menstuff.org/columns/farrell/archive.html
  • Leonard Felder - Wake Up or Break Up - www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/archive.html
  • Marty Friedman - Strong Men, Strong Marriage - www.menstuff.org/columns/friedman/archive.html
  • Kim Garretson - Mansgland - using humor to encourage prostate exams - www.menstuff.org/columns/mansgland/archive.html
  • Lion Goodman - How to get Women to Love You - www.menstuff.org/columns/goodman/archive.html
  • Liz Halliday - In a Man's World - www.menstuff.org/columns/halliday/archive.html
  • Rick Hanson - Just One Thing - www.menstuff.org/columns/hanson/archive.html
  • Tim Hartnett - Daddyman Speaks - being a father www.menstuff.org/columns/daddyman/archive.html
  • John Hershey - Blood, Phlegm & Bile: Parenting with Humor - He writes a syndicated biweekly humor column about parenting and family life. www.menstuff.org/columns/hershey/archive.html
  • Gary Hoeber - Psychotherapy as Soul Work, www.menstuff.org/columns/hoeber/archive.html
  • Patrick Houser - Fathers Make a World of Difference, www.menstuff.org/columns/houser/archive.html
  • Paul Joannides - The Guide to Getting It On - on sex - www.menstuff.org/columns/getiton/archive.html
  • Jack Kahn - NOMAS Boston - www.menstuff.org/columns/kahn/archive.html
  • Patrick Kennedy - Seniors - www.menstuff.org/columns/kennedy/archive.html
  • Joe Kort - Gaydar - to increase understanding between gay and het men - www.menstuff.org/columns/kort/archive.html
  • David Kundtz - David Kundtz - presents seminars, workshops, retreats, and conference presentations in the areas of men's emotional health, stress management, and spirituality. www.menstuff.org/columns/kundtz/archive.html
  • Bruce Linton - Dr. Dad - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/drdad/archive.html
  • Ron Louis - How to Succeed with Women - www.menstuff.org/columns/howtosucceed/archive.html
  • Tom Matlack - Tom Matlack - Good Men Project - www.menstuff.org/columns/matlack/archive.html
  • Wendy McElroy - Wendy McElroy on Feminism, www.menstuff.org/columns/mcelroy/archive.html
  • Robert N. Minor - Minor Details - on GBT sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/minordetails/archive.html
  • Robert L. Moore - Man & Mythology - www.menstuff.org/columns/moore/archive.html
  • Dennis W. Neder - Being a Man - general questions about men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/neder/archive.html
  • Marty Nemko - Worklife - general questions about men and work - www.menstuff.org/columns/nemko/archive.html
  • Eli Newberger - Eli Newberger - general information on men's lives - www.menstuff.org/columns/newberger/archive.html
  • Linda Nielsen - Embracing the Father - working with the father/daughter relationship. www.menstuff.org/columns/nielsen/archive.html
  • Kathy Noll - Bullies and Youth Violence - working with schools, teachers and parents to end school violence - www.menstuff.org/columns/noll/archive.html
  • Mark Phillips - Stay-at-Home-Dads - helping men maintain that which makes us men, instead of becoming hairy Mom-substitutes - www.menstuff.org/columns/phillips/archive.html
  • Carey Roberts - Socialism & Feminism - is a social commentator on political correctness. www.menstuff.org/columns/roberts/archive.html
  • Perry Rose - Dating, Relationship, Sex
  • Glenn Sacks - His Side - on fathering - www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/archive.html
  • Trudy Schuett - Domestic Violence - serving the under-represented www.menstuff.org/columns/schuett/archive.html
  • Carl J. Schutt - Circumcision - social commentator on circumcision - www.menstuff.org/columns/schutt/archive.html
  • Hugo Schwyzer - A Pro-feminist's Response - www.menstuff.org/columns/schwyzer/archive.html
  • Michael Shaffran - Men's Issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/shaffran/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Judith Sherven - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • George Simons - Bellicose Veins - is a US specialist in intercultural and gender communication who hangs out in Mandelieu - la Napoule, France, as well as in Santa Cruz, CA. www.menstuff.org/columns/simons/archive.html
  • Andy Smith - Hard Hat Brotherhood - www.menstuff.org/columns/hardhat/archive.html
  • David B. Smith - Fighting Father Dave - www.menstuff.org/columns/smith/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - Judith & Jim - discussion and answers regarding relationship issues - www.menstuff.org/columns/judith&jim/archive.html
  • Jim Sniechowski - The New Intimacy - www.menstuff.org/columns/newintimacy/archive.html
  • Reena Sommer - Custody - is an internationally recognized relationship and divorce consultant. www.menstuff.org/columns/sommer/archive.html
  • R. Don Steele - Don Steele - relationship questions answered -
    www.menstuff.org/columns/steele/archive.html
  • David Steinberg - Comes Naturally - on sexuality - www.menstuff.org/columns/steinberg/archive.html
  • Mary Lou St Lucas - A Mother's Love - www.menstuf.org/columns/stlucas/archive.html
  • Surprise - Surprise Author - From a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Steven Svoboda - Fatherhood, Activism and the Law www.menstuff.org/columns/svoboda/archive.html
  • Michael Taylor - A New Conversation with Men - www.menstuff.org/columns/taylor/archive.html
  • Bruce Van Horn - Yoga for Men - issues around the health benefits of yoga for men - www.menstuff.org/yoga/archive.html
  • Michael Webb - Secrets of Blissful Relationships - on relationship - www.menstuff.org/columns/bliss/archive.html
  • Stuart Wilde - Spirituality - www.menstuff.org/columns/wilde/archive.html
  • Dr.Williams - Sex Health - on sexual health - Dr. Williams, www.menstuff.org/columns/sexhealth/archive.html
  • KC Wilson - On Gender Politics is a social commentator and author. www.menstuff.org/columns/wilson/archive.html

Plus

  • Health Tips - on general health - www.menstuff.org/columns/healthtips/archive.html
  • Independent Means - resources for raising financially fit kids - www.menstuff.org/columns/independentmeans/archive.html
  • Numbers - www.menstuff.org/columns/numbers/archive.html
  • Questions - www.menstuff.org/columns/q&a/archive.html
  • Surprise - from a new columnist every month - www.menstuff.org/columns/surprise/archive.html
  • Words Can Heal - helping children grow up healthy - www.menstuff.org/columns/wordscanheal/archive.html
  • Wuzup?! - National or international events happening this month - www.menstuff.org/columns/whassup/archive.html

AWARENESS EVENTS THIS MONTH

April is Alcohol Awareness; Animal Cruelty Prevention; California Earthquake Preparedness; *Cancer Control, Community Spirit; Couple Appreciation; *Child Abuse Prevention; Holy Humor; Home Improvement Safety; International Amateur Radio; International Customer Loyalty; International Daffynitions; International Legacy; International Twit Award; International Work Life Enrichment; Keep American Beautiful; Mathematics Education; Month of the Young Child; National Autism Awareness; National Humor; National Knuckles Down; National Lawn and Garden; National Poetry Month, National Self-Publishing; National Sexually Transmitted Diseases Education and Awareness; National Youth Sports Safety; Occupational Therapy; Prevent Injuries America; School Library Media; Spring Ahead for Life; Stress Awareness (breathe); World Habitat Awareness; Zam! Zoo and Aquarium Month. And, depending on the school system, it's also Spring Break.

Mar 13-Apr 15: Deaf History Month. Mar 25-Apr 4: Muharram. Mar 26-Apr 2: Navaratri/Gangaur. And Apr 1-7 Testicular Cancer Awareness Week - Get a Grip!, Genital Integrity Awareness Week, Washington, D.C.; Golden Rule; Dumb; International Building Safety; National Blue Ribbon; National Library; National Medical Patient Advocacy; National Occupational Therapy; National Pecan; National Pet First Aid Awareness; National Poetry; Passion; Week of the Young Child Week. Apr 2-6: Strolf-Stretch Week. Apr 2-8: National Public Health Week. Apr 4-10: Hate Week. Apr 6-8: Alcohol-Free Weekend. Apr 8-14: National Garden; National Week of the Ocean; Network Marketing Professionals; *Pan American; Holy Week. Apr 12-18: National Minority Cancer Awareness Week. Apr 15-21: Grange; National Infant Immunization; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; Reading is Fun Week. Apr 16-20: Consumer Awareness; Egg Salad; Explore Your Career Options; Family Laughing Through Stories; *National Crime Victims Rights; *National Organ and Tissue Donor Awareness; National Organize Your Files; Young People's Poetry Week. Apr 17-23: National Park Week. Apr 21-22: Just Pray No: Worldwide Weekend Prayer. Apr 21-23: Earth Day Weekend. Apr 21-May 2: Festival of Ridvan. Apr 22-28: Administration Professionals; National Karaoke; *National Volunteer; Sky Awareness Week. Apr 22-29: *Jewish Heritage Week. Apr 23-29: Astronomy; National Playground Safety; National TV  Turnoff; National YMCA Week. Apr 29-May 5: *National Science and Technology Week.

Apr 1: April Fools'; Check Your Batteries; Lupus Alert; National Repot Your Plant; Sorry Charlie Day; Testicular Cancer - What is it?, Apr 2: International Children's Book; Reconciliation Day, Testicular Cancer - Symptoms. Apr 3 - Testicular Cancer - What the doctors look for . Apr 4: Thank You, School Librarian; Victims of Violence Holy; Testicular Cancer - Prevention, Apr 5 - National Alcohol Screening; *National Equal Pay; National Fun at Work; National Tomb-Sweeping (Taiwan); Tartan Day; Testicular Cancer - Treatment, Apr 6 - Testicular Cancer - Prognosis, Apr 7 -National Hug Your Newsman; UN World Health Day. Testicular Cancer - Automatic monthly reminder, self-exam and other resources. Apr 8: International Feng Shui Awareness Day. Apr 9: *National Former Prisoner of War Recognition; Winston Churchill Day. Apr 10: National Siblings; Salvation Army Founder's Day. Apr 11:  Barbershop Quarter Day. Apr 12: Vote Lawyers Out of Office Day. Apr 13: Blame Someone Else; National D.A.R.E. Day, Apr 14: International Moment of Laughter; *Pan American; Remembrance Day. Apr 15: National Coin Day. Apr 17: Blah Blah Blah; National Stress Awareness; National Positive Alternatives for Living; Verrazanoo Day. Apr 18: Pet Owners Independence; Third World Day. Apr 19: John Parker Day. Apr 20: Holocaust; National Youth Service Day. Apr 21: Earth Environmental Angels; Kindergarten; San Jacinto Day. Apr 22: Earth Day Anniversary; Girl Scout Leader Day. Apr 25: Administrative Professionals, Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting Awareness Day. Apr 26: Day of Silence; Hug an Australian: National Playground Safety; Richter Scale; Take Our Daughters to Work Day. Apr 27: Hug a Prom Sponsor; National Arbor National Child Care Professionals; National Hairball Awareness Day, Apr 28: Astronomy; Kiss Your Mate; National Sense of Smell; Native American Heritage Day. Apr 29: Mother, Father Deaf; National Puppetry Day. Apr 30: International Dare of Live; International Walk; National Honesty; Spank Out Day USA.

In all of this, don't let Child Abuse Prevention get lost. Check out our extensive sections of issues: Abuse, Circumcision, Gangs, Hazing, Incest/Molestation, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Harassment, Suicide, TV violence, Violence, Domestic Violence, Women's Violence and Prisons. and Books - Abuse of Boys, Child Abuse, Abuse - MPD, Ritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse, Circumcision, Anger, Forgiveness, Violence, Domestic Violence, Sexual Violence, Sexual Harassment, and Women's Violence.

* Means a Presidential Proclamation has been made.

National Missing Children's Day
Help find a missing child!
800.843.5678
24-Hour Hotline

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Men are so competitive that we even "out-die" women in all 15 of the major causes of death in the U.S. Most of these deaths are preventable with a positive change in life-style, eating habits, and/or general health care. Let's not strive so hard to hold on to this record. See what you can change now to live a healthier life.
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